Body: Just before bed last night, strained (mildly) something in my left oblique/QL area. Still a little sore & tight in that area this morning, so I was a bit apprehensive about running, with it feeling a bit similar to last fall's QL nonsense that entirely shut me down. But it wasn't a problem while running; instead my poor cardio and the heat took me down. I was doing okay, then a glorious spell of "amazing," then back to okay, then to "how soon can I bow out," then to damage control. I reached a state that should come at about mile 20 of a 50k, and I hit it at 5 miles. No es bueno. Post-run, that little side strain was cranky, as were my guts; I was exhausted and oddly pukey. I showered, downed a bunch of chips & water, then took a nap. Post-nap, still poorly, but improved after lunch. Sat basically the entire rest of the day. Side was still tight but much improved. Calves & shins better afterward than Saturday; not much there even though I had two near-rolls on left ankle at mile 2.5, and noticeably tired calves for the last 3 miles.
Brain: Initially had fun in the woods, a gloriously gorgeous morning, and I wasn't solo and relying entirely on my own brain to keep going. But that may have made me push a bit hard and fall apart. I miss BK willing to make his easy runs SUPER easy, and sweet Heidi, perfectly happy to walk & chitchat. It's hard to run with DQ because he's such a machine; it's hard to run solo because it's just so damn hard, period. It's July and my cardio sucks and I'm going to run a 50k in three months? I'm already stressing over the pace while I'm running, and have to keep reminding myself that I'm still supposed to suck, I just started running like 10 weeks ago, after 6 months off. (But, um, people don't generally try to kill a 50k 5 months after they start running, either.) While running I was thinking about whether I should back off powerlifting for the next three months. The idea makes me want to cry but perhaps it would benefit to change my program to one meant to prioritize running. But...I don't want to lose everything I built up over the winter. I don't want to be back at a total square one in November, like I was with running in May. I WANT TO DO IT ALL.