Tuesday, February 9

Body: Decent, but hip is still there somewhat, so I deferred squats again. Shoulder has been better, usually don't think of it while driving anymore, though still using the pool noodle on the couch. Session was okay, although pull-ups went down (conclusion: too fat) and bench was yet another fail (conclusion: so weak), but I didn't fall apart. Actually felt rather MEH about it.

Brain: Fine. Doing much better than even a week ago, but still on the low end of "me." A small piece of the stress I keep feeling seems to be the unending "to do" lists at both jobs. Tax season will ALWAYS have a never-ending pile to weed through that I need to forget about; I honestly can't think past the next return without wondering how in the FUCK it will all get done, so I should stop bothering to think that far, right? At NSS, I should be thankful I feel this way, that a 5-hour/week job turned 24-hours isn't leaving me bored. But there is a huge project I'm trying to work on that just drains me (software that I hate and would decline if we didn't already have/use it...and yes, I'm aware of "sunk costs" fallacy) so I tend to avoid it for all the fun stuff, some of which I could delegate - so meanwhile it's nearly mid-February and I've made SO LITTLE progress compared to where I thought I could be a year ago when this was going to become a real job. I'm mad at myself and the shitty software and the feeling of total uselessness.

Anyway, though, brain is fairly stable; was able to go home and knock out chores like a hair-cut, sweeping & vacuuming, and writing instead of reading. Go me!

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