Tuesday, January 12

Body: Decent. Session was okay, nothing stellar. Squats okay; outer left hip flexory area didn't pinch below parallel, but was still feeling weird. Pull-ups slightly better than recent past. Bench okay but should not have gotten greedy to try for 135 (strength was there, exact technique was not). Felt extremely tired by the time I got home, but was probably all mental.

Brain: Good most of the day. Had afternoon review with boss boys, and left things unsaid that I wanted to say, and I was not BRAVE, and I hate how I feel now. I must remember that. Must. Being rejected would be easier than not knowing and making up stories in my head instead. This left me feeling quite MEH afterward. The brain was helped by finding FLOW in a deeply complicated spreadsheet, but my coworkers' unhelpful admonishments of "Why are you still here?" easily erased it. (Dearest coworkers: it's because I have tons of shit to do, and I'm most productive when you are not interrupting me, so SHUSH.) At the tail end of my day, I spent time on the phone trying to recover my lost Relay for Life fundraising page, destroyed by using their [apparently shitty] app to update it. (I don't have the info elsewhere. They will tell me within 48 hours if the old version is recoverable, stored somewhere. Please please please, it's 8 years worth of fundraising data, I NEED IT.) At home, life was better, and the brain came up a little bit. But only a little. Went to bed with a racing monkey mind.

No comments:

Post a Comment