Friday, February 6

Nutrition: Went for giant dose of supper calories again. So tired.
  • 5a-fried egg sandwich w/ Slawsa & bacon, coffee w/ CM
  • 915-Renola w/ CM, coffee w/ CM
  • 1215-tuna w/ mustard & rice crackers, apple
  • 145-Larabar
  • 330-bacon jerky
  • 445-Kind Strong bar
  • 630-Daiya pizza, bootch 

Sleep: 8 hours in bed, 845p-445a, 72% quality. Woke constantly; pretty sure I saw 130a, 330a, 4a, BLECH. Monkey mind stress bullshit. The 130a wakeup felt like it was a cortisol shot, like not enough calorie intake yesterday, but I was too tired to rise.

Healthy Movement: Body is just a wee bit sore from deadlifts. Impressive. Well, then I did my class warm-up and felt quite a bit more sore than I realized, but all a good sore; no aches, just tightness where it belongs and a slight all-over fatigue that is still much better than prior weeks.

Fun & Play: Chitchat with hubs, BB, BK, HH. Fun class. Productivity. Nice afternoon at NSS. Laziness at home. Small dose of hubs time.

Stress Management: Overworked, overcommitted, overstressed, underslept. I'm such a goddamn idiot. Yesterday I was able to cope with whatever came my way, but today, not so much. I am overwhelmed by my workload at a time that my real life is in dire need of extra attention, and so I am suffering. I did what I could at TS and then I left at my usual early Friday time. Refused to stay late and had zero fucks to give about it. As I walked to Pepe I started to calculate the hours I worked there this week, and I stopped the calculating with this answer: a lifetime. I feel like I've worked a motherfucking lifetime this week. And I haven't, not really, but when factoring in my workouts and stress, I am maxing myself out to my limits. My energy level was pretty low at NSS but I held it together, and was boosted by bonus Dustin time. But still walked out dragging.

48 hours at TS, plus 4 hours at NSS. In five days. Plus 4.5 hours of workouts plus Grandpa plus hubs issues, plus I am a delicate flower to start with, and Jesus Aitch Fucking Christ Sabrina, what do you expect? You're guaranteeing to feel like shit, yo. And what if I had to work Saturday as well instead of finally having a day off? Why am I doing this to myself?

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