Saturday, August 2

Nutrition: Sometimes I still get caught up in worrying that I eat too much. Today I was at 1725 after my lunch. Jeez, once upon a time that was my tally for the day, maybe even only for a high day. And yet, I put on ten fucking miles this morning, so why I earth would I EVER think that 1725 was enough? Because I was told that by all the experts. Well, fuck them! Here I am proving them wrong. I might not be skinny, but I'm definitely not the lard ass that I was told I'd become if I am eating 2500 calories per day.
  • 530a-eggs, chicken sausage, toast, sweet potato, coffee w coconut oil (and more coffee)
  • 730-fruit leather/bar
  • (during 2.5h run-only water & 2 salt tabs)
  • 10-banana, mixed nuts
  • 145p-eggs, bacon, toast, sweet potato, coffee, kombucha
  • 5-pint AZ 
  • 730-summer sausage w/ rice crackers, carrot cake super cookies
  • 2500 cal, 500p/1300c/650f
Sleep: 8.25 hours in bed, 9p-515a, 86% quality. Felt solid as hell. Tried to nap after my post-run shower, but I just dozed in/out for an hour.

Healthy Movement: Got up feeling those bitching hamstrings, still. It's been 4 days! Didn't know how much to expect out of the long trail run, and desperately wanted to avoid beating myself up if it sucked, knowing odds were against it being anything above mediocre. Almost immediately I saw this hole in the dirt, and visualized stuffing my cunty internal self into it. And as I ran off, I told myself she was there forever. There wouldn't be (and there wasn't!) chatter from her on this run to tell me I suck for not killing the hills, or miles, or any of it. I decided to go after just two big rocks: time on feet, and downhill form. It worked out well, and this was a good balance of both physical & mental needs. It felt great to be moving, even when it got hot and hilly, and I was madly, madly, madly in love with GLSP all over again. That $25 park pass was worth $2500 today. Rest of the day, tight in left core again, and right outer hammy worse than the others.

Fun & Play: Great run outing. Feeling myself again. Almost-nap. Deer in the backyard. Bacon! Bunch of fun with my goddaughter Emma: racing go-karts and eating at CherryBerry (I bought a pint of AZ from the Grain Bin like a goddamn GENIUS so we ate "ice cream" together outside). Husband planted trees in the yard - some day we'll have mighty oaks shading us! Quiet night at home after getting bills paid.

Nature: I haven't the words to fully describe what today's GLSP visit did for me. When I reached what I call the "bliss spot," the locale that everyone who's ever been there absolutely falls in love with, I was in tears (of happiness). I knew I needed nature, but I had absolutely no idea just how much it could do for me. I was utterly overwhelmed. I walked slowly through that spot, just absorbing it, feeling the love, opening up.

Mother Nature wrapped her arms around me, touched her forehead to mine, and whispered her certainty into my very soul: it's going to be okay.

Of course it is.

If ever there was a place that exudes the meaning of Namaste, there it is. It is there.

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