Wednesday, May 28

Nutrition: So much sweating; I NEED ALL TEH SALTY FOODS. (Like bacon. Too bad I overslept.) I ate like Hulk today, so damned hungry all day long. 

Sleep: 8.5 hours in bed, 845p-515a, 66% quality. Yes. Took ages to fall asleep, then awake 2-3a; up at 230a for bathroom, water, few mixed nuts - nearly h/s/g but not quite, just...wide awake. Had plenty of calories yesterday, don't know what that was about.

This is how light it is outside when I go to bed.
I am a CHILD.
(And yes, of course I close the windows & blinds & curtains. The black curtains!)

Healthy Movement: Body is really feeling the squats, and also some upper body tightness - all good aches. Debated not joining in on class, but I guess I'm not QUITE at the point of prioritizing recovery. Maybe I'll get there. Probably more days of feeling like squats have killed me dead will help...oof. Noon walk to run was easy peasy; a warm 77F but felt quite a bit better than last night's awfulness, less humid. Legs held up okay. Testing my limits by wearing Pace Gloves, Vibrams, etc, on some of these outings, just to see how it goes. Picked up trash for an hour, and felt properly self-righteous about asshole litterers to start, then the heat and sore GD legs slowly wilted my attitude. Had to scoot out before the picture so I could make it to the eve walk to run, which I took extra slow compared to normal, let Brett lead the way while I kept the back of the pack on track. Walking, backward running, outright stopping at some turns made the slow pace, but I did also focus on slowing down while staying smooth. Gliiiiiiiide. Felt fine, legs didn't really affect it, but jesus balls were they aching by the time I was at home.

Fun & Play: Class. Productive meeting. Noon run. Met with Brett to work on volunteer positions for LAE races. Bonus time in nature! Eve group. Miss Lexi doing very well with her cone of shame.

Temperance: Forgot to mention that I have officially let go of the muscle-up, and Dustin is in. I want a strong, happy body. Muscle-up work was not really making it stronger, and definitely not making it happy. It feels a lot like giving up on the goal of "looking good" (ie, being lean), and instead focusing on the trifecta of being strong, running injury-free, and feeling good. It's better for me as a whole, but it's still a little hard to concede, to give up, to "fail" at leanness. Yes, fail is in quotes, no lectures required.

My new goal to Dustin was a bodyweight bench. Now THERE'S a long-term goal! Given that my max is 120, and has been stuck there for quite a while, and my current BW is somewhere around 145-150, we could very well be talking years of benching and honing in technique. So I have to (get to!) do a lot of benching and will be forced to learn keep the big picture in mind when I fail at 120x2, or whatever. This kind of goal makes SO MUCH MORE SENSE for me. The same way that the Wild Duluth 50k sounds like a fucking blast (because so is the training) while a road marathon sounds like torture (because so is the training).

The PATH TO THE GOAL has to be enjoyable for me - not just the goal itself, as that sense of accomplishment is terribly, terribly fleeting. But if the entire journey there was fun and/or satisfying, does it actually even matter if you ever achieve that goal?

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