Friday, August 30: RD25

Nutrition: Highly variable - remembered to add stir fry to breakfast for the first time all week. However, I also ate a macaroon after breakfast. Had DP & cookies when I got news the FIL was worsening. Finished my cookies PWO to refuel, nicely done. Had a salad & bunch of cherry tomatoes at supper, gold star - along with homemade coconut ice cream and several macaroons. Can you say "emotional eater"? Win some, lose some. Not remotely one of my biggest concerns right now.

Acne: Worsening today. I'm going to operate on the theory that a single can of DP is probably okay, normally, but a lot is not, and even a little may exacerbate a current exposure.

Sleep: 8.75 hour sin bed, 9p-545a, 94% quality. Took a while to fall asleep again (worrying about FIL - able to stop work thoughts, hooray for that perspective) but was pretty solid once I did. I woke often in AM, but got up feeling well-rested. Impressive given the supper-time cookie-binge yesterday.

Healthy Movement: Feeling tight in upper back, though lower body is good. Left foot achey, pissing me off, but I still hit hills with Holea, and the foot was fine during that. Felt energized by the stress (Kill All The Things) rather than defeated (The Things Are Killing Me), plus chatting with my pal, plus hills that FELT good; all good for the brain. We nailed our 5 trips up Victoria, finally, and she was delighted when I later told her that was the ceiling, we aren't now progressing to 5.5, 6, etc. Post-run, tight calves but fine energy.

Fun & Play: Productive work morning. Hills with Holea. Productive at NSS. That's all I've got.

Stress: Father in law is slated to move to nursing home regardless of what may happen this weekend. CAT scan done in AM. He was apparently confused & off-kilter around noon, which was hard on everyone. Rotten results received in PM: brain swelling a teensy bit bigger, but cancer has grown in his lungs, and now is also in his liver. Worst doctor's words possible: "Nothing we can do." No estimate on how long he might last.

And through all of this, I was working, like a fucking jackass. Feeling guilty that I was able to avoid the raw pain and wasn't there with Hop.

Brought home a pile of work reading, grasping for productive things I can do while sitting in a hospital room, which might be much of my weekend, though I selfishly hope I can still escape for my wooded runs to maintain some semblance of peace.

Grateful: For the pain meds that have him feeling okay. Let's not add any more suffering, shall we?

Thursday, August 29: RD24

Nutrition: Surprisingly not feeling the usual sterss-eating urges most of the day. But jerky and cookies for supper? Don't mind if I do! I did include kombucha, but still. The only thing that finally stopped me was that my sleep would be shit if I kept going.

Acne: Still reacting. I blame the cookies from the past two days. And stress. Adding DP to it, along with GF cookies. Not my smartest move.

Sleep: 9.25 hours in bed, 9p-615a, 100% quality. FINALLY. I woke a time or two, including 5a, but was mostly completely out. Mental exhaustion.

Healthy Movement: Body feels pretty good, other than slight ache remaining in left foot. Session was pretty great: solid deadlifts, slight miss on pulls and bench, but given stress: fab.

Fun & Play: A really tough work issue was improved by having a really great conversation with my lead. Session with my Buddy, watching her deadlift 230 for a double like a fucking beast. And we plotted that next month when she joins me, we are playing hooky for the afternoon!

Stress: Work, in a big big way. Father-in-law, also in a big big way. This is no good.

Grateful: For my stress-free session. A peaceful oasis of beastliness.

Wednesday, August 28: RD23

Nutrition: Hungry much of the day. Weird eating schedule due to noon LAPW meeting and eve hospital visit.

Acne: Definitely having some small reactions. I'm thinking that means I can eat the cookies (seed-based), just not three servings at once. Hmph.

Sleep: 8.25 hours in bed, 845p-5a, 81% quality. Woke at 4a, dozed until 5a, gave up then. Felt pretty solid up until that point. Probably could've made it in to teach class, but I was happy to take a slow-moving morning. Decent energy most of the day but tired and yawning 4p onward. 

Had a dream that Dustin was helping me shop at a hardware store that also sold German Shorthair dogs, and he talked me into buying Hank a buddy. If only! Hank would LURVE a poochie pal to play with all day long.

Healthy Movement: Left foot still a bit achey. Thinking that's related to wearing the tiny heels on Saturday & yesterday. Seriously tiny, 1-1.5", but that's too much? Ugh. Donated blood first thing today, and felt great afterward. Still, instructions say to avoid strenuous Holea convince me not to sprint. Took Hank on a short walk instead. Baby steps. Tired after that. 

Fun & Play: Slow-moving morning was good for the brain. Walking with Hanky. Afternoon off. 

Stress: Melrose hospital with the in-laws hearing "wait and see." Ugh. 

Grateful: That my FIL is coherent and "all there," just tired. Easier on everyone else. 

Tuesday, August 27: RD22

Nutrition: Ate more than I needed to, but not concerned. More upset by team lunch where no one ever bothers I ask if I will have things to eat. Some day I'll get over that. 

Acne: Added lemon cookies tonight. Possibly a bad idea, as I have some almost-cysts just starting. Maybe. 

Sleep: 9 hours in bed, 930p-630a, 81% quality. That's pretty poor quality for NINE HOURS. Took a NyQuil but still took ages to fall asleep thanks to the nap yesterday afternoon. Woke at 4a, fell back. Woke at 5a, fell back. At 630a, considered trying to fall back yet again, but figured I should make the 8a meeting. Which was canceled.

Healthy Movement: Legs are tight/sore from yesterday's workout. I am almost never sore from my squat session! What the eff? Drinking pleny of water to get this nonsense flushed out. Feeling a little more energized, though happy to take a full rest day again. Tired and a little cranky by mid-afternoon. Aches and pains from past issues coming through as well, such as left foot. 

This makes three rest days in the past four days. Compared to FOUR rest days in the prior TEN WEEKS. Hm, could the latter be causing the former? It seems possible that Doing All The Things, despite eating enough perform, may have caused me to get run-down elsewhere in the body, such as the immune system, which has led to the state I'm in today. I hate being weak.

Fun & Play: Sleeping in! Afternoon team huddle to go over true business stuff, a nice break from usual work, then play time in the outdoors. And an early end to the day so I could veg with my critters and mindless TV-watching. Just what I needed. 

Stress: Team meeting left me feeling like I am doing a crappy job as a lead. 

Grateful: For my opportunities. 

Monday, August 26: RD21

Nutrition: Easy & good at breakfast. Gross and not even hungry at lunch, but I forced it down. Supper similarly not hungry, but I looked until I found something good. Odd combo: tuna w/ mustard on toast, and mango/coconut flake "ice cream." And these:

I have spent the last month tracking calories, roughly, and am averaging around 2200. Was mainly tracking in an attempt to tie intake to sleep results, but they are all over the damned place. So, whatevs, I'm calling it quits on that: no more wasting time on non-value-add activity!

Acne: Not worsening. Coffee is okay, I guess. Perhaps it was the purchased coconut ice cream that prompted a small reaction. Guess I just have to make my own from now on! On to testing the cookies.

Sleep: 8 hours in bed, 845p-445a, 54% quality. Yes, that's accurate. FML. Awake at 315a, got up for bathroom, water, coconut butter after 15-ish minutes, and never even came close to falling back after that. Overheating, cats, knowing I just plain didn't have time for a solid sleep cycle. Heat is probably a big factor here.

Got more and more tired throughout the day. Felt like crying when I fucked up my session time, and again when I thought about it on the way home...despite the fact that I let down no one else, didn't fuck up Dustin's schedule. Just that damned worn down and tired. Wanted to curl up under my desk and cry by 1p due to feeling overwhelmed with work, much like when tax season beats me down. Had a 2p meeting that had already been rescheduled umpteen times, so I toughed it out until then. And then came home, and took a blissfully solid 2-hour nap. Wish I'd had those hours this AM!

Healthy Movement: No specific aches or pains, serious overall fatigue; was feeling generally okay until Dustin asked how the body was doing and I realized the answer was "Junky." Turned out to be the word of the day, plus lungs still have me hacking if I laugh or breathe deep. Session was squat only, no bench, since Dustin had to ditch me halfway through and leave me solo - because I'm an idiot who can't read (saw "9-10" and put "10" on my calendar). Left me feeling stupid, which is extra disappointing because today is my four-year anniversary with Dustin! Gave him a couple treats and a list of "Things I never said before 8/26/09" - some of them braggy, some of them silly. Was fun to write.

Anyway: squats good, pulls shitty. Had planned eve sprints with Holea, but Dustin advised against it, and by the time I was done with my workout, I fully agreed.

Fun & Play: Session, I guess. Mostly felt stressed and completely effing overwhelmed and exhausted at work. ZERO FUN. That afternoon meeting turned out to be a good one, so that helped. But leaving early for a nap with my kitties was the biggest key. Brought Hank inside for training, and also because it was blazing hot.

Grateful: That this is a slow week at work. Able to ditch early to nap, yes, but most importantly I am able to ditch Wednesday and Thursday afternoon to join Hop in taking his dad to radiation treatment.

Sunday, August 25: RD20

Nutrition: On schedule again. Brain fine. No thoughts about food between meals. Eat when hungry, do other stuff when not. I like this!

Acne: Flavored coffee again - need to determine whether THIS flavor is bad, but the one I started with is okay, perhaps.

Sleep: 8.25 hours in bed, 1045p-7a, 77% quality. Up for bathroom at 4a. Back to bed, realized I was hot, back up for water. Debated eating something, decided my heart was not racing and therefore I would be fine. I was. Woke naturally but still felt damned tired. Before noon I was back in bed! Napped for two hours, 10a-12p, like a[n aging] rockstar.

Healthy Movement: Allover fatigue. No enthusiasm for my planned lifting workout. Early in the day, was listening to a podcast featuring Eva T, who drills Type-A "stress addicts" for overdoing everything. (Oh, hai!) She emphasized that if such people don't feel up to a workout, then they shouldn't do it. With the addition of Dustin tomorrow rather than Tuesday, and the cold that I'm still fighting, decided I could skip it this week.

It would be a good choice to log a run/walk, or even just a walk, but HOLY BALLS it's hot out, and I've zero interest in heat training. Unfortunately, that may be my only option for the next week of insane temps. I might actually use the treadmill this week. Barf.

Fun & Play: Picking cherry tomatoes with Hank. (I'm soon to be deluged with them, if it stays hot. Silver lining!) Laziness most of the day. Had supper plans with two old friends, but the hostess postponed due to the heat. Happy to comply; I did not go farther outside than the bird feeder today! Hank got a lot of indoor training time, and lots of hugs from me for being so good. Cats shot me daggers.

Stress: Yesterday I told Dad I could take over his monthly QB work. Shouldn't take more than a few hours a month, so I'm feeling it's quite manageable. Plus, I can do it Saturday or Sunday or whenever works for me, which is a top requirement.

Last week TS put out a call for a half-time dev-op to take on the Well tasks. I wish I could do that. I told Hop that if we could afford it, I would leave my position and do that job, and pick up QB jobs/tax firm to fill in the rest of my time. Is this a sign that I'm not too fulfilled by leadership, or just another example of how I want to Do All The Things?

Grateful: For my poorly-constructed-but-effective greenhouse, and the incredibly sweet cherry tomatoes it's helping to produce. 
Better than candy, for realsies.

Saturday, August 24: RD19

Nutrition: Solid breakfast at home, then gone the rest of the day. Lunch was a family event, potluck, and my contribution was GF brownies, since it was also mom's birthday. Wedding supper, at a place that I doubted would have food for me. So, to make sure I would have grub, I packed along bananas, apples, a Larabar, 2 packets coconut butter, 2 slices GF bread, and jerky. Better safe than sorry!

At the potluck, I ate the bread as open-faced sandwiches (pork AND beef) otherwise there was fruit and cukes to nosh on. My brownies were a huge hit, no one suspected they were gluten-free, and they loved the coconut flavor! It made me nearly cry when I learned my cousin with Downs Syndrome had recently been forced to eat GF...and she enjoyed herself two brownies. Wonderful.

At the wedding, my only option was ham. So I dashed out to the car and returned with a banana, apple, and the leftover brownies. And that ham was pretty damned incredible, so it was a great supper after all.

Acne: Testing Diet Cherry Pepsi today, in need of caffeine to stay awake for the wedding reception, and too hot for coffee (was out-Marthalered by my relatives who DID drink coffee today). Beginnings of two cysts later in the day, now unsure if that's a coffee reaction or what. Perhaps the second flavored coffee is bad, first was okay? Could I possibly react that quickly to the DCP? That seems unlikely.

Sleep: 9.25 hours in bed, 945p-7a, 89% quality. Woke at 330a for bathroom, water, coconut butter. Hot. Got up tired and feeling grateful for a rest day. Various small aches and pains, such as left big toe joint - locations of past issues. Nothing to worry about, I don't think; just another signal to rest & recover for a bit.

Healthy movement: Felt okay, not achey like I expected. But certainly fatigued and appreciating a lazy day, that turned out to feel exhausting. Lot of standing at the reception, some of it in heels (only 1.5", but still), and my feet were fat at the end of the day. Why? I'm used to standing for 10 hours every day! Weird.

Fun & Play: Productive morning. Quick trip to pet store, where I got to pet a tiny orange kitten that surely was the spitting image of baby Clyde. Adorable! Family outing. Outfits changed at my SIL's, where I saw FOUR baby kitties, some with eyes still closed. Precious little fluffballs! Excellent time at the wedding, catching up with many old drinking buddies.

Grateful: For baby animals. I love my kittehs, but there is nothing cuter than a teensy fluffy unsteady wee kitten!

Friday, August 23: RD18

Nutrition: Mixed bag. Breakfast before the LCSP run, breakfast afterward, proper snack post-hills. All good. But supper was a salad...and a pint of coconut ice cream. Plus some coconut flakes. And toast.

Acne: Same, but it's disappointing to waste this time on flavored coffee. It's gross after all the great black coffee. Want to hurry up to cashews! Erm, I guess the coconut ice cream is also a test. Some junk in there.

Sleep: 8.75 hours in bed, 9p-545a, 85% quality. Still waking a lot. Damn this cold! And also, perhaps, the heat: A/C setting is not cranked down to the blissful 50F overnights we recently enjoyed.

Healthy Movement: Got up feeling pretty darn good despite the poor sleep. The 5.58m trail run with Britt felt decent, slowed by lungs. Uplifted by a pair of adorable spotted fawns! My uphill running date with Holea turned into a 2.61m downhill running date, as we were both tired and she might be feeling the beginning of sickness. Plus she had to knock out some monster squats afterward. The downhills felt rather crappy - right hip, left foot, right shin, even a touch of the IT bands. High time for a rest day tomorrow.

Fun & Play: PTO. Trailz. Deer! Chatting with Holea. Super lazy evening with my kitties. Indulgent treats.

Grateful: For paleo junk food.

Thursday, August 22: RD17

Nutrition: Making sure to get enough calories, added some choco-coconut butter to breakfast. But it tasted way too sweet. Who am I? On the other hand, bad news had me snacky in the eve, so I made chocolate mint coconut ice cream, and it was perfection.

Acne: Flavored coffee again. So unexciting.

Sleep: 8.75 hours in bed, 9p-545a, 74% quality. Woke often 1230-230a; got up around 2a and ate some coconut butter and read for a while. Not sure why; calories should have been right in the sweet spot of sound sleep...guess I can probably blame the cold. One Nyquil should have been two, perhaps? Coughed myself awake at 545a. Doing okay, thanks to DayQuil, but only needed 1 all day.

Healthy Movement: Feeling about the same as yesterday. Session was a mixed bag: kicked ass in pulls with a PR of 13, but dips were terrible. Eh, it's only exercise, right?

Fun & Play: Not so much today. Got news that my father-in-law's cancer has spread from his his brain. They are going with 10 radiation treatments, and that's all they've got. Fuck cancer, man. Fuck it straight to hell.

Grateful: For cancer treatment advances. Some cancer?

Wednesday, August 21: RD16

Nutrition: Back on track...partly because all the treats are gone, but also partly because eating is a chore. Being sick/too hot has me uninterested in eating, quite unusual for me.

Acne: Clearing. Nothing new. Hooray for rice flour! Next up: flavored coffee, because I'm out of the good black stuff but have a few boxes of flavored K-cups.

Sleep: 7.5 hours in bed, 9p-430a, 71% quality. Slept fairly solidly and woke naturally, but sure could've used more. Feeling a little stupid, but mostly fine, thanks to DayQuil.

Healthy Movement: Got up feeling good everywhere except my HEAD. Did class anyway: suck it up, buttercup! Neck a bit stiff afterward, not sure why. Felt enthusiastic about a noon run, somehow, so we did quarters, 2.6m. Felt good, though definitely limited by lung capacity. I felt SERIOUSLY limited by my lungs for the sprints with Holea. Slower than past weeks by quite a bit. Still fun & felt good, though.

Lot of sitting today (4.5-hr meeting) that left me stiff. I am no longer made to sit all day!

Fun & Play: Class with Bob. Easy morning. Fun run with my Lisa. Easy afternoon. Fun run with Holea. Lazy evening at home, and the first time I've seen Hop since Sunday!

Grateful: That the cold is barely slowing me down.

Tuesday, August 20: RD15

Nutrition: Another brownie at breakfast. Seriously? It was pretty perfect, though...and I finished the pan when I got home from the KITC event, where I had only eaten a banana & apple as supper. Well, at least my calorie quantity was in line, if not the quality.

Acne: Most of the existing cysts are starting to heal. Nothing new. Hooray!

Sleep: 9.5 hours in bed, 845p-615a, 84% quality. That much quantity, that poor quality? Oof. I remember a bit of tossing & turning, but never had to get up at all. Last night I took two Benadryl, but I still woke up stuffy, so I'm considering it may be a cold instead? This AM I took one of Hop's allergy pills, a non-drowsy med. I got almost no change.

Healthy Movement: Other than a full head & somewhat stiff neck/shoulders (I think all due to cold/allergies/whatever this is), also a slight tightness in calves; sort of swinging from feeling pretty good to wanting to go back to bed. Session went better than expected: pull-ups kicked ass!

Fun & Play: Helped at a Financial Literacy 101 training, which always makes me feel smart! A better-than-expected session. Fun KITC event with Emmers that included seeing the K-9 dogs, a fire truck, and getting her fingerprinted.

Grateful: For the KITC activities.

Monday, August 19: RD14

Nutrition: I ate a brownie at breakfast. Oops. Got (and felt) back on track after that. Until I finished off the peach cake after supper. Whelp, that's gone. Just have another 1/4 pan of brownies that will probably disappear tomorrow night. And then they'll be gone and things can go back to normal.

Acne: Doesn't appear to have worsened since yesterday...fingers crossed!

Sleep: 8 hours in bed, 9p-5a, 74% quality. Up at 130a for bathroom, water, macaroon, in/out the rest of the night. Pretty terrible, felt like I was awake every hour. Hot & humid. Was solid just before 5a, naturally. I rolled over and snuggled down ready to sleep another lifetime or so, and then felt the phone buzz. RAGE / depression.

Healthy Movement: Body feels good, but the allergies/poor sleep had me feeling run-down and MEH. So I only taught class, gold star! I did sneak in 5x2 banded dips at the end. Logged an "easy" 3.03m run at lunch. HOT. But no walk breaks! Take THAT, allergies!! I actually felt better after the run, but I started backsliding again mid-afternoon. Planned to join Holea for sprints anyway, but she rescheduled to Wednesday. So compared to my usual three-fer Monday, this was pretty much a rest day.

YTD pull-ups update: 3297. Just 1703 to go, and 19 weeks left...I'm going to smoke this goal by mid-December if things keep going well!

Fun & Play: Actually enjoyed just teaching class. Sent a goosing to our product development team for the awesome gluten-free line. Satisfaction of a solid run. Afternoon bell-ringing with my team. Perfect blend of productivity and laziness at home.

Temperance: I registered for Boston 2014. I immediately pre-apologized to Dustin. I sent a very difficult email to the tax boss telling him that I shall sit out this season. I shall also skip the 2014 powerlifting meet and 2013 WD50k and teaching a 630am class January-April and I SHALL BE OKAY. Because all of these things can return to my life after I finally cross that elusive finish line.

Third time's the charm, or three strikes & you're out...either way, it's my last guaranteed Boston, so I'm taking it. And I am accepting the trade-offs.

I wonder if it will be okay to stop, get down on all fours, and kiss that beast?

Grateful: For the gift of a third chance. For the understanding of my people as I sacrifice so much to prove myself worthy of that gift.

Read This: Whole9

It’s Just Exercise (Part I)
Most of us aren’t professional athletes or Olympic contenders–99.9% of us are not getting paid for our time spent in the gym. And for those of us who aren’t professionals, for whom performance doesn’t actually make a difference to our fame or fortune, sometimes we get a little (okay, a lot) too worked up about our workouts.
If I don’t make my pull-up goal, my Mom is still going to love me, my bank account is still going to look the same, the number of books I sell won’t dramatically fall off.
Genius. I'm getting better at keeping perspective - for example, I didn't feel at all upset yesterday at the failed OH Press max - but my gut reaction is still usually to ride hard up the peaks and down into the valleys with full emotional force. This post is a great reminder to keep perspective.

Find all the nuggets here:

Sunday, August 18: RD13

Nutrition: Feeling back on track, wasn't craving extra breakfast calories, unlike the last couple of days. But those brownies and cake, well...they were rather irresistible. Moderation was NOT had.

Acne: Adding the peach cinnamon cake (more rice flour) to yesterday's/today's brownie experiment.

Sleep: 8.25 hours in bed, 945p-6a, 81% quality. Tossing and turning initially (checked time at 11p) and at usual 330a onward. Dreaming about having no power for like a week. (A nightmare, really!) Also, allergies began kicking in yesterday, which is a full month earlier than usual. Not terrible yet, mostly just drainage/sore throat, but it really seems to be affecting sleep. UGH.

Healthy Movement: Got up with all-over stiffness, mostly in right upper hip. Pretty good, considering! Logged my long-ass lifting session and failed on the OH press, cycle to be repeated. Deadlifts harder than usual, but still doable; bench & press & chins felt strong as hell. Win some, lose some.

Fun & Play: Hanky trying to lick me during my warm-up. Solid session. A clean house. Family supper. Drainage-fix suggestions from my brother were not outrageously expensive (though also not free).

Grateful: For my family. They rule.

Saturday, August 17: RD12

Nutrition: Feeling a bit carb-addicted today. Thus probably not an ideal day to make tomorrow's brownies, but ZOMG SO GOOD. Made them slightly overdone so the outer edges are crunchy, my fave; managed to limit myself to 1/4 pan.

Bronze star?

Acne: Hating my face today, seeing even more reactions; wondering if the restaurant meal would've had crap on the pork chops, like soybean oil on the grill? I hate eating out.

So yeah, it's not ideal timing to add the rice flour test, but it is what it is.

Sleep: 8.5 hours in bed, 930p-6a, 86% quality. In/out after 3a as per usual. Obnoxious! Feeling rested, but still took an afternoon nap 2-4p with my kits: delightful!

Healthy Movement: Got up feeling good, but not sure I was up for pushing hard on the trails. Felt awful getting out of the car, but better once I was walking around and moving. 4.73m run itself felt great, just a few points I was dying to walk, otherwise it was easy peasy, more like recovery miles. Wasn't sure how hard Britt could push, wanted it easy enough that she'd love her first real trail outing, so I tried to find a balance between those two goals. Could feel tired hammies at the tail end from yesterday's hills. I spent a lot of time debating more miles this weekend since I still didn't log the "hard trails" I'd intended...but on the other hand, I feel like I should accept the great miles from the week, all of which felt pretty much fantastic, and not push for more than that from the running gods. So I took a nap instead. Gold star!

Fun & Play: Trails. Chatting with Britt afterward. Dog park that included half the NSS family: Barks, Lila, & Becky, plus Luke, Sawyer, Lincoln, & Jennah. Super awesome! Catnap. Indoor Hank time. BROWNIES. Quiet peaceful reading time.

Grateful: For old books that smell like old libraries.

Copyright 1959. Bliss!

Friday, August 16: RD11

Nutrition: Solid. Easy. Had to add some calories in the eve, even. Yeah!

Acne: I literally have a dozen cysts after just a few days of double-servings of almonds. Eff.

Sleep: 9 hours (!!!) in bed, 915p-615a, 91% quality; not very deep sleep, but again sound until about 4a, then cats were running a freaking obstacle course that included the bed and nightstand. Jerks!

Healthy Movement: Got up with stiff feet, all else feeling good. Finally settled firmly on a running plan for the weekend, and headed out for 5.63 miles in the form of run 10min / walk 5min. Easy peasy, which was the goal, saving up for hill repeats with Holea.We did 4.5 trips up, beat last week's paces, and felt better as well. Woo hoo! 2.46m total.

Fun & Play: A run that felt good both physically & mentally. DEER! Time playing with Hank. Two errands nailed. Uber-productivity at NSS. Playing with Holea's pup Mitzi for a whole half hour! Indoor Hank time. Lazy TV time.

Grateful: That I had free time to stay at NSS and play with the Mitz. Tiny dogs are delightful!

Thursday, August 15: RD10

Nutrition: Doing okay. Back onto W30 until my face calms down. Supper at a restaurant where I found a way to get a decent meal: iceberg topped with salsa, pork chops, baked potato topped with salsa. The salad was nothing to write home about, but the rest worked. Glad I am no longer afraid of carbs, otherwise it would have been sad.

Sleep: 8.75 hours in bed, 9p-545a, 79% quality. For that kind of time, sad quality. Out soundly until 330a, then in/out after that. At least I didn't have to get up at 330a, but even at 545a, I wanted to keep sleeping. Tired.

Healthy Movement: Got up with creaky feet and sore glutes (wonder how Travis feels!), and still that tightness in upper right back. I've had a couple twinges on top of right foot today & yesterday, but it's just a little zing and then business as usual. Hm. And to make pain that even clearer, the zing in my left heel when doing inchworms is now gone. Session felt fantastic, and the back felt better afterward. That's the beauty of NSS!!

Fun & Play: Half-day of work at TS. Booked a meet-up with my missing bud Amy on the weekend that we are camping in WI; she is a mere 1.5-hour drive from the racetrack. Yippee!! Session. Work at NSS. 

Supper out with my oldest goddaughter, who is 14, going into 9th grade, super athletic, and dealing with an ankle problem from a sprain back in December. We bonded over the suckage of injuries that keep you from doing your favorite things, and how much you would give to just be healthy again. Poor girl. We went out for no reason, not her birthday, just to chat. It was awesome, because SHE is awesome! She's the exact kind of girl I would have been so jealous of in high school that I would have hated her. (Why do females get this way?) Also, she suddenly looks so much older...I wish I saw her more often. I also wanted to go in & see the family when I dropped her off (I worked for her parents for 6 years), but it was already 8p. Stupid body!

Grateful: That this godparenting gig survived the divorce.

Wednesday, August 14: RD9

Nutrition: Snacky at breakfast, tried the chocolate macaroons. Ahhhh-mazing. And yet I still was able to share 2 with the Buddy that initially introduced me to the glorious, beautimonious macaroon. Isn't she lucky! Surprisingly hungry today, mid-afternoon hunger pangs, not just snackiness. But then I reached for coconut butter and it turned into foolish snackiness. I feel like the cravings I slayed in my W50 are already inching back, just one week later. Gah.

Acne: Getting worse. Have eliminated the double-serving of almonds. Hopefully just in time to test the rice flour in the TS GF products on Sunday.

Sleep: 7.5 hours in bed, 9p-430a, 82% quality. Definitely not enough. Woke around 4a and dozed until I realized that if I fell back, it would be more painful to hear the alarm. Blech. Was able to ease into the day slowly, at least.

Healthy Movement: Got up feeling good. Achey shins, and slight "crank" in right neck/shoulder/upper back area. Perhaps a bench press PR will do that for ya? Did Spartacus for class, hard as hell, loved it! 5 uphills at noon with Lisa  - downright fantastic paces, and they all felt damned good to me. Woot! Again more sitting than usual, couple hours of meetings - which included leading the stretches before the all-team meeting. Got that out of the way, cleared for 4 months now.

Fun & Play: Class was awesome. Crank the AC/DC and sweat up a storm! Fabulous noon outing with my running bestie. Pure laziness at home in eve that even included TV. What?

Grateful: For quiet nights with my snuggly kitty.

Tuesday, August 13: RD8

Nutrition: No problem, logged the 2 doses of almonds today via Larabar & pWO almonds. Perfectly satisfied with my planned meals but also too busy to think much about food. Like it! Whipped up some breakfast sausage tonight, such a productive gal today!

Discovered a treasure trove at the Grain Bin tonight: 
That tart was incredible. It SAYS 2 servings, but you know I ate it as one. And then had a nice bellyache. Worth it.

Sleep: 9 hours (!!) in bed, 845p-545a, 86% quality. In/out beginning at 330a onward, though I didn’t need to get up. Very glad I got that 9 hours, otherwise quality would’ve been much worse. Don’t know why it wasn’t more sound; had a perfect supper and a totally normal training day and zero extra stress. Hmph.

Healthy Movement: Got up feeling pretty damned good! Whole lot of sitting today, many many meetings. Felt like a real and true lead!

Session was uber-fantastic: 120# bench press PR! Totally made up for mis-counting my pulls: I had a goal of 12 in my head & when I hit #10, I doubted I’d get another, but it turns out I was at #11...if I had known that I would have definitely gotten another! Oh well. I’m still happy, because I'm pretty sure there was a lot more leg-swinging last week. And also because I hit double-digits TWICE! (Also, I have no idea if the squats are accurate. Thinking I was more focused on the pulls with that SS.)

Fun & Play: Feeling successful at my job, despite the massive amount of meetings. Fucking BENCH PRESS PR, bitches!

Grateful: For the Well that led me, baby step by baby step, from 10-minute toning, to beginner yoga, to Amy’s class, to walk-to-run coaching, to Dustin, to where I am today. Bitches!

Monday, August 12: RD7

Nutrition: No problemo, Mondays are all about decent nutrition with ease. On the other hand, I nearly cried when I discovered two of our four new gluten-free products are potentially things I can eat (rice flour...maybe?) and got excited to make them for the family this weekend & test them. Perhaps I am feeling a bit more deprived than I realized.

Acne: Nixing the flavored coffee. Keeping up a double-serving of almonds. I ran out of my tapioca bread, but that does seem to be fine.

Sleep: 8 hours in bed, 845p-445a, 88% quality. I was tossing & turning a lot initially, then it was solid - completely backward from my norm.

What up with that?
Healthy Movement: Stiff feet & lower legs when I got up. High up on right hip feels a bit angry, as does left side of low back. Too much twisting & turning yesterday? It felt fine once I did my warmup, wasn't at all bothered by the workout, AND felt better AFTER 50 deadlifts than it did before! (Bitches!) Back continued to be perfectly happy for the rest of the day; right hip stayed a touch tight, but no worse after 10 park sprints w/ Holea.

Fun & Play: Initially annoyed that I was up early for a non-class (read the "cancel! sorry!" email at 5am), but decided to choose my attitude and enjoy a leisurely morning. Didn't get to my desk until 7a, and I didn't do a damn thing other than move significantly slower than normal; 'twas quite lovely! Also enjoyed smashing weights and being loud in The Well, turning the heads of the poor saps who were numbing up their minds on treadmills. And of course, what's not to adore about sprinting with Holea?

Temperance: I'm thinking I need to invest in some new workout shorts that fit better, so I can train without even noticing my belly. The funny thing is that I do not give a rat's ass how much my thighs are exposed, because "them's muscles" and I don't really care how big they get. But the belly, oh mah god, don't look! I know it's completely fucking stupidly dumb. I'm trying, people.

I also had this thought, observing a skinny coworker: there's a ton of skinny chicks in this world. But how many chicks can do one single pull-up, much less double-digit pull-ups? Yeah, forget that first camp...I care a whole lot more about being in the second.

Grateful: For short weeks. I just gotta make it through 3.5 days, then I have a 3.5-day weekend! I'll mainly be running & lifting & dog-parking; I couldn't be happier!

Sunday, August 11: RD6

Nutrition: Nailed some solid food prep that included salads, stir fry, and carnitas. Bitches! Felt less snacky today, despite the long run. I even managed to stop myself from eating ALL OF THIS, perhaps the best thing I have ever tasted. EVER:

Thanks for the hot tip, Joy!

Acne: Large cyst forming, began late yesterday. Hm...almond overdose, or flavored coffee?

Sleep: 8.75 hours in bed, 10p-645, 92% quality. Up at 4a for bathroom, but managed to fall back. Lovely!

Funny: had a dream I did 9 max NG pulls and was majorly disappointed.

Healthy Movement: Got up feeling better than expected, given yesterday's many hours standing on concrete, bent over chicken carcasses. However, the 5.5m run was a bit of a struggle. Super technical sections kept me from settling into a comfortable pace, combined with the feeling of another runner breathing down my neck, which pushed me faster than I should've attempted. I only did one lap, then a few of us tacked on 2 easy miles that were half walking.

Felt mildly depleted for the rest of the day. Managed two sets of five chins, but my ambition for more completely disappeared when they felt tough.

Fun & Play: It was a great time running with such a big fun group, and the trail itself was a delight. Then a solid lunch where I got a chef salad so big that I didn't feel the least bit deprived. Fantastic! 

Grateful: That this can be considered a light week:

Saturday, August 10: RD5

Nutrition: Not great today. Tired & overate almonds/raisins mixture at breakfast & supper. No available veg at lunch, thus I overate fruit. Very snacky in the eve, struggled big time. Forced myself to eat some cabbage in an attempt to stop the cravings. GD that's frustrating, have not battled such feelings in a long time (most of Whole30, hmmm). Various reasons: poor sleep, not enough water, long tiring day, sad deprived lunch feelings.

No acne reactions so far.

Sleep: 6.75 hours in bed, 1015p-5a, 70% quality. Felt solid and woke naturally, though I sure could've used longer. Love that the wild 430a cats from nearly every morning this week were sound asleep today. Jerks.

Healthy Movement: Body felt good, but spent the entire day butchering chickens, 8a-5p. No energy left for a workout. Frustrated, not sure when/if I can make it up, but telling myself tomorrow's run will feel that much better without 50 deadlifts the day before, so accept & enjoy it!

Fun & Play: Chicken butchering wasn't so bad, actually. Fun peeps, went quickly. Brought Hank along to run and play with all the dogs & kids, but...he's a bird dog. And we butchered 83 birds. He spent the day tied to a tree and crying. No fun for Mr Hanky.

Grateful: For the many healthy meals these tasty chickens will make.

Friday, August 9: RD4

Nutrition: Toast at breakfast & supper. Also had eggnog coffee - out of unflavored varieties. Also overate cinnamon-glazed almonds. Long day, too tired, too dumb. Bonus; no new cysts from Wednesday's triple whammy of toast, Reese's Pieces, and double almonds!

Sleep: 8.75 hours in bed, 9p-545a, 89% quality. Wide awake (almost h/s/g) 2-3a or so; got up for bathroom, water, raisins, still took a while to fall back. I'll blame this on too many supper calories. Dummy. Got up feeling okay, but I've got to get a handle on this because I can't always sleep in!

Healthy Movement: Actually got up feeling pretty good. Slightly stiff back from deadlifts, came and went throughout the day, typical and nothing concerning. Hit Victoria's Revenge with Holea for 4 trips up (2013 PR!) then ran back to NSS, total of 3.77m. Took a 2-minute walk break at only 7 minutes, but resuming after that felt wondertastic, likely a combo of the easier pace, being almost done, plus uneven sidewalks that felt near to trail running!

Wore my brand new kicks, which worked great, but need to get them on some slick trails to really test them. I've got $120 into these babies, they'd better work! Although if they last 733 miles like the Pace Gloves, they'll be worth it. I'm also going to get Brett Larson-smart with my shoes and alternate regularly between all 4 pairs so one new pair isn't a major deal.

Fun & Play: Friday! More optimistic conference livestream, was productive in tying up some loose ends. Hills and chatting with Holea. Super satisfying afternoon at NSS, though sadly quiet. It's not nearly as fun when I'm alone! Wish I could work there on Friday mornings instead.

Grateful: That my first job allows me the flexible hours to have a second job that I love so much.

Bonus Gratitude: I can't believe I'm not saying this every single day: I'm so very, very grateful that I'm not injured. I'm having such fun doing all these workouts, especially being able to log bonus runs with Holea. Or things like class - I am planning to do Spartacus next week with Travis, knowing he will absolutely bust ass to avoid falling behind me. Meanwhile I'm also strong enough to land a trapbar PR & keep pull-ups progressing, and what's more fun than Moar Pullz?!

I'm easily logging 8-9 hours of workouts per week, and not just uninjured, but actually feeling great. And damn it all, I'm just plain happy, and I'm sure everyone else is grateful for that!

Thursday, August 8: RD3

Nutrition: Toast at breakfast and supper. No new acne after what popped up Monday, so far so good, but then it's only day 3.

I also had a stroke of genius (for me): I laid out a weekly reintroduction plan. I'm hoping this helps me otherwise stick to W30, since I'll know that food is going to be allowed in x weeks. Current planned order, subject to change: toast, 2s almonds of almonds, cashews, SF syrup, Diet Cherry Pepsi. It's already working, as I resisted the urge to add a mid-afternoon Larabar, due to having had almonds already in the AM.

Sleep: Ugh. 8.25 hours in bed, 930p-545a, 76% quality. Was wide awake 3-4a or so, though not h/s/g. Tried to fall back initially but at 330a, got up for bathroom, drink of water, bite of creamed coconut. Still took a while to fall back.

Healthy Movement: Tiny bit stiff & achey all over (hi, squats!) but otherwise good. Freezing cold at 1130a, but I no longer know if that's related to my caloric intake or my new desk location! Session felt pretty great: deadlift PR, boost in 2nd-4th pull-up sets, AND consistent dip form. Yeah, bitches! Slightest bit of back ache post-session, nothing to worry about.

Fun & Play: Productive morning. Awesome session. Deadlift PR. Chat with Dustin about Boston. Afternoon watching some unveilings down at conference. Eve pontoon ride with LAPW, though it got behind schedule and I missed taking Hank to the baseball game.

Temperance: Lately I am starting to feel like I can do it all again (normal life + tax season + Boston training + LAPW Philanthropic chair + etc) but logically I know that I simply cannot. If I learned just one thing from the past few depressing winters, it is that I have more enthusiasm than I do energy.

So in a strong moment today, I replied to the LAPW email and declined. And I used Boston training as the excuse.

Next up: tell the tax firm, which is very difficult for me. I wish I could keep working there by trading a day of PTO from TS, but year-end is not a time I can burn up PTO, especially as a lead, so instead I must disappoint the entire tax firm. And for selfish reasons. And thus, this may possibly be tougher than all the running I will be doing.

Talked about it with Dustin and he provided me with the best line ever: if I sign on for both tax season AND Boston again...he's quitting. I actually gave him a high five, because that is exactly the kind of thing I need reinforced to me! I am not Wonder Woman. I can't do it all. I must pick and choose and prioritize.

I also realized that part of the reason I am getting these doses of "Maybe I can do it all!" is because, right now, I AM doing it all. But I'm doing all my favorite things, nothing that is mentally challenging, and it's perfect weather, and work is not stressful, and I have no personal stressors. That will not all be the case January through April, yo.

Grateful: For Chief, the wise reality-bringer.

Wednesday, August 7: RD2

Nutrition: Again added toast (topped w/ peach butter) to supper. Somehow had no desire to add at breakfast, which is odd. And nice. Unplanned, and foolishly, I had Reese's Pieces today as well. (It's cookie day, and I'm human.) Then I got home to an un-chewed Amazon delivery that included the cinnamon-glazed almonds Hank got last time, so I ate too many of them as well. ARGH. Now, if I have a crop of fresh cysts by tomorrow, was it the toast or the RP or the excess almonds? I won't know. On the other hand, if I have no fresh cysts, they're all in the clear - cross your fingers!

Sleep: 8.75 hours in bed, 9p-545a, 92% quality - totally fucking bomb dig. Got up feeling like a rock star. Wait, they probably get up feeling like shit. Got up feeling like a morning person!

Healthy Movement: Little all-over stiffness first thing, didn't last. Since Lisa skipped our noon run (in favor of a free lunch), so did I. Instead, due to my upcoming off-kilter weekend o' chicken butchering, I logged my OH Press & high-rep squats today at lunch. Went great! I still have a lot of work left to try squeezing into Friday or Saturday, but if I can't, at least I got my priority lift in. I also messed around with bands to figure out how I can do dips at TS: fresh addition to Mon/Wed class, bitches.

Between consultant tours at Lake Bountiful, I logged a 3.28m trail run around the lake (twice, kind of - the path is not complete). Ran even the uphills since it was short, but was still forced to walk through some thick sections of brush, so the pace was super easy.

I am really digging the ability to log multiple workouts. Makes me happy.

Fun & Play: Productive morning. Included browsing the NETA classes and pondering a yoga certification. Now that Heather is gone, we do not have anyone teaching it. Hm. I think my ideal job would involve PT group fitness and PT accounting. And I can make that

Afternoon feeling like a celebrity with the consultants, and in the sunshine, and with a hilarious coworker, and running trails. It felt like I was playing hooky!

Grateful: For the annual chance to spend my afternoon outside at Lake B, getting paid to stroll the grounds and agree with our consultants that it is a peaceful, beautiful, under-utilized locale.

Tuesday, August 6: Reintroduction Day 1

Nutrition: Tonight, after a breakfast-supper, I caved and had my fake-ass GF tapioca toast.

Guess what? It was perfection, especially topped with coconut butter on one slice, and coconut oil & peach butter on the other. Hot damn! I've been getting very tired of searching for more/different calories when my GD crappy toast is right there, and I'm pretty sure it's fine, and what goes better with eggs & sausage than toast?

So there you go. Unplanned cave = reintroduction phase has begun. With fake-ass toast. (Hey, beggars can't be choosers.)

Sleep: 8.25 hours in bed, 930p-545a, 90% quality. Don't think I woke until 445a, at which point the cats started acting wild and stupid. Dozed in/out until I just gave up. Feeling mostly rested, but REALLY wish my boys weren't so crazed. Hank was wild too, digging into things before it was even 7a. Hop said it's because there's a big storm coming. Why does this make critters so nuts?!

Healthy Movement: Sore feet, but that's it. Even my right hip flexor is perfectly happy. I'm impressed at my recovery from short workouts, even when multiple in a day. Wish my long-run recovery was similarly impressive! Session felt good & strong.

Dustin asked me [rather rhetorically, punk that he is] if I am in a better place than I have been in the past few summers, better able to do whatever I want whenever I want (this came up after telling him I again ran twice yesterday, plus class). I absolutely am doing better, but of course I'll say something like "but that's because my goals are smaller" because I have now removed the 50k from my training plan which means I'm not pushing myself through any 4-hour trail runs. But it's also undeniably true that I can now throw in extra sprints and/or hills whenever I like, or log a rather insane 2-hour-long lifting workout that includes 50 reps each of squat, bench, & deadlift (every week), or continue logging 100-ish pulls per week - without injury and with feeling good!

I firmly believe that is because I am Eating The Food, which means I'm fully recovering. And while I'm not exactly slimming down, I'm not any fatter. And I'm not stressing about the lack of fat loss. I'm getting closer to the end of the spectrum that realizes that the ability to do anything I want is more important than how I look. Not there yet, but I feel that it's possible to reach that destination.

Fun & Play: Busy but productive & chipper team this morning. Great session! Put in time off requests for the next two Fridays (after this one), for no real reason. May get to schedule a date with my oldest goddaughter next week Friday - the one who is so self-assured and wise for her age that I would give anything to be as cool as her. Was going to take Mr Hanky to a ball game, but rain ruined it. And that was fine, because I was overbooked anyway.

Food Prep: The rain gave me time to whip up some food. Yams: check. Cabbage + onion + side pork: check. Roasted cauliflower: checkaroo! I've been SCROUNGING after not getting in my weekend food prep, so this is a relief.

Grateful: For a learning pooch. He had more in-house training tonight, and he didn't bark once!

Monday, August 5: W30D50

Nutrition: Due to incomplete weekend chores, poor food quality today. Shortcuts galore. I am a dummy. Today I read a bit about starches (because I'm feeling like I need to end this damned W30 and eat my tapioca-based toat to get a little variety from yams) and came across one I've forgotten: water chestnuts. And bacon-wrapped water chestnuts are pretty much the Best Treat Ever. Woot!

Acne: Reacting to something. Guessing soy in yesterday's marinade, as predicted. (I should have stopped eating the meat as soon as I was told that, but I didn't want to make the BIL feel badly.) I also had a whole lotta almonds on Saturday, so that's also a suspect. I am terrible at experiments.

Sleep: 8 hours in bed, 845p-445a, 81% quality, but should show worse. I was wide awake at 1230a (storm) and checked windows, hit bathroom while I was up. But I could not fall back, was still awake at 130a. I got up and had some water & coconut cream, still took awhile. Mind was not stressed, no idea what was going on there.

Healthy Movement: My shins hurt more today than they did yesterday. Is this a two-day post-run soreness, or does it have something to do with lifting, not running?! All I did yesterday was lift, and most of the day was spent on my bum.

Did class which was ratcheted down from usual hardcore level, since my attendees are staring into the eyes of a max-stress-week. So moves were easier and should reduce any soreness. Cool note: Travis said he's still sore from last Wednesday. Meanwhile, I wasn't sore in the slightest afterward!

Ran 3.08m easy hills at lunch. Felt shins in the downhills, all else good!

Ran sprints in eve with Holea. All good!

Fun & Play: Class was fun. Productive morning. Literally ran into Shawn S while headed to the hills, had a bonus li'l running chat. Sprints with Holea! Received many compliments on today's dress, one I seriously doubt every time I wear it - weird. Included a "CUTE shoes!" compliment from a total stranger at Elden's. Attended wrap-up meeting for Relay in the eve. And then came home to a house full of husband-completed projects!

Temperance: Received an email asking me to chair the Philanthropic Committee for LAPW. Please remind me that I decided "not this year" a long time ago.

Grateful: For little miss Holea. She's great fun to chat with, keeps me logging these bonus runs, and her squats impress the shit out of me. Last night I watched her logging 175x5x5 - meanwhile my 1RM is 165. And she did those after our sprints. Hey Zeus Christo!

Sunday, August 4: W30D49

Nutrition: Feeling like I'm getting better recovery from workouts - probably due to PWO eats like today's: baked sweet potato, cold, dipped into peach butter, & a beef hot dog. (Could eat this every day. Weirdo.)

Probably ate some soy today via the meat marinade at BIL's house. Argh.

Sleep: 8 hours in bed, 10p-6a, 81% quality. Felt much better, like I never woke at all; graph looks like Oscar may have been extra twitchy.

Healthy Movement: Body feeling pretty damned good, even shins are fine - after yesterday's long run? Really?! Energy level much improved. Lazy most of day (baptism, lunch) then logged a super OH press session.

Ordered me some new shoes, two different pair of Merrells - gotta find something with better grip for those muddy trails!

Fun & Play: Gained another goddaughter! Much reading done. Slightly unproductive, and will hate myself for it later this week, but...felt good today!

Grateful: For my new goddaughter! Currently six months of smiley, bright-eyed adorableness, and soon to be great fun to spoil; playing the role of Fun Aunt is the best.

Saturday, August 3: W30D48

Nutrition: Too many nuts. Felt snacky all damned day. Lack of sleep? Long run? Both?

Sleep: 7.75 hours in bed, 945p-530a, 86% quality - felt much worse. Woke often, tossing & turning. Alarm woke me, angry. Logged a nap 3-5p. Still tired after that, lazed on couch.

Healthy movement: Tired, aching feet, didn't rush to Glacial to run but took the time to eat breakfast & wake up. 8.62m run itself went great. Made easy by walking up all hills, taking pictures, etc. I logged a half hour, then Lisa joined me & we ran another 1:20. Shins a bit better than yesterday and not made worse during run; return of usual post-long-run sharp pain in left knee; sore hams and glutes as well. Post-run, spent the day rather tired, snacky, thirsty: depleted.

Fun & Play: Trails! Dog park overflowing with buddies. Finished a fluff book in all of two days for the first time in ages.

Grateful: For state parks.

The peace & quiet of this morning's trails made me so very happy.

Friday, August 2: W30D47

Nutrition: Easy. Had a mini "ah ha" moment yesterday where I realized I'm not thinking about food All Of The Time. In the past I've had moments where I wondered why we can't literally eat nonstop every waking hour. No longer anywhere near that insane thinking! I am simply feeling like I can eat when I need to eat, be satisfied & satiated, and get on with life. 'Tis good great!

Sleep: 7.25 hours in bed, 915p-430a, 68% quality. Wide awake (but not up) at 130a or so, and woke shortly after 4a unable to fall back. Wired. But tired. Hm.

Healthy Movement: Body is feeling good. Slight upper body & glute tightness, but in a great way. Easy version of hills since Holea was in a bad place. Shins ached as always, but no worse with running.

Fun & Play: Friday! Hills with Holea! NSS! Fun reading!

Grateful: That four dollars could buy 23 books! (Well, plus a $5 donation to support this book sale returning!)
I thought money couldn't buy happiness?

Thursday, August 1: W30D46

Nutrition: No problemo. Over-flowing with vegetables. Better stocked with some meat shortcuts. And I am now fully loaded with coconut butter & coconut cream to keep my calories up without nuts. Feeling very good.

Sleep: 8 hours in bed, 915p-515a, 84% quality. Solid but woke early (445a or so) and couldn't fall back.

Healthy movement: Shins still ache, all else good. Session felt bomb dig. 11 pulls! YTD tally: 3062, which is 130 ahead of schedule. Today Dustin & I figured out that if I just keep up a consistent 30-ish with every NSS session, plus 30-40 at my home lifting session, then 5000 pulls will actually become my new normal! Right shin ached all day, feeling it most as my weight shifts to the inside ball of foot (toward big toe).

Fun & Play: Team a bit loopy & fun all morning. Solid session. Fellow team member pointing me to a super-prime parking spot post-session! Used book sale: $4 for an over-stuffed bag, feeling like it's my birthday! Dog park with my three favorite Great Danes, slobbery sweet bouncy buddies.

Temperance: Received an email from the Boston Athletic Association:

Dear Sabrina:

You have been identified as a 2013 Boston Marathon participant who reached and was recorded at the half marathon checkpoint or later, but who did not have the opportunity to cross the Boylston Street finish line on April 15. Later this month, you will be eligible to register for the 2014 Boston Marathon during a special registration period.
This registration period will begin on Monday, August 19th at 10:00 a.m. Eastern Time and will conclude on Thursday, August 29th at 5:00 p.m. Eastern Time. In order for your deferred entry to be accepted, you must register before the deadline. If you do not register during this period, your deferment will not be accepted.

I've got 4 weeks to figure it out. I'm leaning toward registering, because I can register & change my mind, but I can't NOT register & change my mind. And little by little, I'm feeling more willing to throw my usual life out the window and focus on running, but only because it's ZOMG Boston. It will be heart-wrenching to tell the tax firm peeps that I won't be there. It will be challenging to stop teaching class. It will be awful to sit out of the WD50k. It's almost unbearable to think that I'll be spectating again at the NSS powerlifting meet. But I need to come to terms with these sacrifices long before I'm deep down in the thick slimy muck of both guilt (for letting down others for pure selfishness) and jealousy (at my fellow runners' ease, or Joy's & Holea's monster squats) - I need to be 100% certain that Boston is worth it, and I need to figure out what to tell myself when the "woe is me" bully begins chattering inside my brain.

Grateful: For the little people in my life, like Baby Bear Alana, who was deadlifting at NSS when I did my pull-ups. Such a beautiful wee reflection of her strong-ass Mama Bear Joy...and with many extra years of intelligent strength-training to her advantage, where might this child take her beastly talents? I am truly excited to watch and find out!!