Thursday, July 19

6a-c reg w 2T coconut milk, supps
730a-c reg
830a-tall Americano w SF syrup
930a-2c decaf
1145a-1.69m run to Lake Bountiful
2p-played yard games (I was sweating, it goes down as pink!)
3p-30-ish min kayaking at Lake Bountiful
345p-1.68m run back to TS
4p-sl egg bake, 2 chicken sausage
830p-2 sl egg bake, T cashew butter (ugh), 3T coconut butter, 2T coconut flakes, homemade popsicle (nom!),
930p-oz pistachios
Throughout day-4 quarts water

IF: Plan: all day long. Wanted to eat breakfast, as I felt kind of crappy when I got up. Stuck to my plan. Used pullups for motivation. Then I felt REALLY crappy at 11am. Gave in and ate. Felt crappy after kayaking, too, so I ate again. At home in eve? Just plain ate like I was dying. God damn it all.

Sleep: 8.5 hours in bed! 9:30p-6a. Got to bed late due to yoga; woke without alarm at 5, dozed until 6. Got up feeling well rested.

Body: SORE. Hams & glutes are very pissed at Dustin! Bit of general fatigue going on.

Brain: Not really up for fasting today; over the past month, when I felt like this, I went ahead and ate. This time, tried very hard to stay strong. Today needed to be a fast day to make some fat loss happen and return a little momentum to my efforts. I realize that I just spent 4 weeks at maintenance, but they didn't feel like maintenance. I still felt like I was dieting that entire time - because I was (just 1-2 days would blow up each week). So while my body got a break, my brain did not. And today I'm feeling the body's fatigue again, just like I did the first 8 weeks, and I just don't want to feel like this. But that's what fat loss feels like. And it sucks.

And I just couldn't quite hack it.

But I'm kind of questioning whether I need to hack it...strictly by the numbers, I spent a month at maintenance. But strictly by appearance...I may have been in a small deficit...maybe. I'm not objective enough to be able to tell...and I have no objective measurements like weight or inches. Dustin?

Afternoon was team huddle, quite fun; included yard games and kayaking and running. Eve at NSS was even fun, very productive. But once I got home: dog tired. Eat-y. Should have gone straight to bed.

WOD: Success. I do not feel successful today. I set a goal, I totally missed it. I need to start building up some small successes again, get that flywheel turning, however slowly!


Be so good they can't ignore you.
-Jerry Dunn

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