Thursday, July 12

415a-2 fr eggs, 2 sl bacon, 2 sl toast, micro cake w T coconut butter, c reg, supps
6a-half Uberbar, c reg w T coconut milk
630a-taught class, did warmup & finisher
730a-Americano w SF syrup
930a-greens smoothie, oz almonds
12p-personal training
2p-sl egg bake, 3oz pork tenderloin, c grapes, 1 Caveman Cookie, supps
4p-few grapes, few raspberries, few strawberries (cleaning up team treats!), few spoonfuls coconut flakes (to balance the pure carbs)
630p-oz cashews/walnuts, supps
Throughout day-4 quarts water

IF: No real supper, just two snacks.

Sleep: In bed 7.5 hours. Should've been 8.5 but Hop's alarm work me at 4am. GAH. Oh well, sleep was solid, and I did feel very awake at 4. Ate an extra large breakfast and spent a bit of extra time reading to ease into the day.

Body: Really good. No issues!

Have I mentioned my posture observation? If so, too bad, I'm doing it again. When standing, I tend to balance half up on the balls of my feet. Belly juts out, lower back curve is over-emphasized. This was a problem when my back was acting up, but now I also noticed what this does to my appearance.

Try it yourself: Stand this way sideways in front of a mirror. Then bend your knees just slightly, shift your weight back into your heels (you should be able to briefly pick up the balls of your feet here) and watch how your core engages: your belly pulls in, back flattens out.

If you can't see this, well, either I can't explain it right, or maybe you've got too much belly fat to see it. That's where I once was. But now I can finally see it! I don't know how to keep fixing myself until standing that way becomes automatic, but I am determined to do it!

Brain: Really good. $1210 raised for Relay, against a goal of $1000! SO impressed by all my peeps!

Last night I stood in front of the mirror in bra & underbritches (I just love using that word), and objectively analyzed my body. Really & truly: objectively. And I realized that I liked what I saw. If that was someone else standing there, a friend, I would say and mean: "You look great!" So you know what? I fucking told myself that. And believed it. That's worth every single pound of iron I've moved, every drop of sweat, every mile, every uneaten slice of bread, every temporary feeling of deprivation. I wish that I could bottle that feeling and take a hearty dose when I feel awful and snacky and cravings threaten to overwhelm me.

WOD: Dream. About tomorrow, about next year, about 5 years from now. Where do you want to be in terms of personal achievements, career achievements, house, family relationships, retirement accounts, vacations? I don't know where exactly I want to be. I have many dreams, much more enthusiasm than I do energy. I wish I could find a focal point that feels RIGHT. Still open.

Quote:

Once upon a time, a caterpillar and a butterfly were sitting on a branch. The caterpillar admired the butterfly’s wings and brilliant colors.

"How can I become a butterfly?" the caterpillar asked.

The butterfly answered, "You have to want to be a butterfly so much that you’re willing to give up being a caterpillar."

I love this.

Love.

It.

Fuck caterpillars, my friends.

Be a butterfly.

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