Saturday, March 3

745a-2 fr egg, 1.5 sl bacon, honey mustard on GF English muffin, grapefruit, c reg, supps, unsweetened almond milk latte
1030a-oz trail mix, Larabar
130p-sloppy joe filling scooped up w/ potato chips, 5 pickle spears
3p-can diet Coke
5p-can diet Coke
6p-4oz trail mix, Larabar, can diet root beer

Very difficult not to use Jack as an excuse to eat a lot. I know I shouldn't care about fat loss on a day that my old friend is buried, but eating fistfuls of food don't fix feelings, and that's the lesson I was trying to stick to. By the time I got home (shortly before 1am) I was hungry again but was able to convince myself that my body (and brain) needed sleep more than food.

-3 slow, easy am pulls. I was going to get back on track today but I hurt everywhere, even my freaking forearms! I would attribute this to two days of solid workouts without enough proper rest to recover. Sore upper back, tight lower back, sore shins - but again, long run recovery is fairly good, similar to last week.

Weight: 136.8 lbs, 19.9% fat - down .2 lbs from yesterday, down 1.2 lbs from a week ago. Surprised there was no long-run water-retention freakout.

Sleep: 5.5 hours in bed, terrible sleep. Back hurt every time I moved so woke often. Managed to "sleep in" until 730a. Got up aching pretty much everywhere and feeling super dehydrated.

Habit: Bad. Didn't do it, plus I stood around for several hours at the party in 1.5" boots.

Misc: Funeral at 11, followed by burial, followed by meal/remembrance, followed by party. First time I ever wore a skull tee, jeans, and pirate-y boots to a funeral! And the last, I hope. I want all future funerals to be decorous events in honor of OLD PEOPLE. Please no more young'uns. It's way too fucking painful. Agony.

At the funeral Jack's brother Jerry gave a very short eulogy and said someone at the wake had told Jerry, "Jack lived more in his 35 years than I have in 70." And that's the truest truth anyone could say. He was buried in a coffin that he & his buddies (including my brother) made in shop class. The nails were hammered in by his brothers, best friends, and father. He was transported to funeral & cemetary in his own hearse, which had been used many times as a rather unique "limo" to take buddies to events like monster truck shows or snow cross in Fargo & the Cities.

At the cemetary, there was no formal ceremony, just a few shared thoughts and stories, and (earlier in the morning, prior to the funeral) much rubber laid down on the road by his old buddies. A couple of the buddies topped the coffin with Hostess treats, Snickers bars, & suckers, and we said our goodbyes and let the family & besties toss in some dirt. The rest of the day was filled with sharing stories. There was a nice meal & rememberance at Gerard's complete with Jack's favorite music & a slideshow. It then moved on up front to the bar at Gerard's where I was able to talk with my brother & cousin, both of whom thought of Jack as one of their best buds. That was good for all three of us.

I learned from my brother that the avalanche they were trying to cause was actually purposeful - the guide himself would've been doing it if they hadn't wanted to. By causing the avalanche on purpose, safely, it would prevent someone from unknowningly causing one. Jack simply took the risk far too high, and certainly not for the first time in his life.

After the bar, we went out to Jerry's shop. It was actually really nice to start out, just the small "band of brothers" sharing their best stories. I literally wanted to record it as a core workout, because it was so filled with laughter. Later it devolved into a more typical party complete with some people (hi, my husband) dealing with the situation by drinking far too much. But overall the day was a good, powerful tribute to the most unique dude most of us will ever meet.

And I ended the night by locking my keys in my car yet again, like the genius little sister I am. And in the process of three buddies & a cousin trying to break into Pepe, one of them scratched & dented the door frame. My cousin was concerned & upset on my behalf, but you know what? I don't fucking care. I mean, I care enough to have my dad fix it, but if there's anything I learned this week (especially reinforced by all the stories of Jack's love of property destruction) it's this: stuff is just stuff. Money can fix stuff, or replace stuff, or you can live with crappy stuff or even no stuff. But nothing ever replaces people. Or memories.

So, the lesson of Jack: forget the fucking stuff, and spend your time & money making memories instead.

Eat like you've just had a heart attack. Work like your job description is under consideration. Talk like everyone can overhear what you say. Live like you're going to have a face-to-face with your Creator every day.  
-Stephen Covey

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