Recipes: EZ Whey

I made a bunch of Emily Zaler recipes on Monday.

All of them can be found here:

Here's my feedback on everything I made:

Pumpkin Swirl Egg White Puffs - fairly satisfying if you eat them immediately & fresh from the oven, but they deflate a bit and thus they're a bit disappointing re-heated, even topped w/ syrup. I got 14 from the recipe, though, so it sure feels like you're eating a lot, a good trick for the brain.

EZ Whey Pumpkin Pie (minus crust) - this turned out terribly unsatisfying. But I used egg white protein powder so that could be the culprit: I essentially had cooked egg white at the bottom, topped with a thick flax pudding that just wasn't sweet enough. I'm going to re-try with whey protein.

Cinnamon Swirl Pumpkin Protein Loaf - pretty eggy, tasted a bit like French toast but with the texture of an omelet. Mine looked NOTHING like her picture, not remotely bread-like. It deflated some out of the oven, and I cut 4 "slices." For a low-carb day, it would suffice as substitute bread to dip into egg yolks.

EZ Kabocha Squash Protein Pancake - delicious. I used pumpkin instead, since that's what I had on hand. Definitely will make again.

Low Carb Flax Waffles - did NOT work as a Belgian waffle: crispy but not fluffy. Perhaps a regular waffle would work, I don't know. It did get fluffy as a pancake, but not very sweet. I'm using them as "bread" with my eggs for now. Going to remake them with pumpkin pie spice and see how they work. I got one failed waffle and four 4-5" cakes.

EZ Whey Protein Pudding - delicious and the right texture, very satisfying. More calories & less quantity than Arctic Zero, but definitely a lot cheaper.

December 28

445a-2 fr eggs, 2oz pork sausage, flax pancake, c reg, Met, multi, fish oil, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-c reg, stevia
8a-2c decaf, stevia
9a-3oz chicken, .5c sweet potato, T Vidalia onion dressing
1130a-multi, fish oil, calcium, CLA, ALC
12p(LAPW)-salad, T Italian dressing, 2oz chicken, oz beef, c peppers/onions, 3c reg
2p-salad (romaine, celery, cauliflower, peppers, peas, balsamic), can diet dr pepper, 2c decaf tea, multi, fish oil, calcium, CLA, ALC
330p-2c decaf tea
730p-Met, greens, yeast, guar gum, NC, multi, fish oil, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine

Totals: 1357 cal, 57g fat (17 sat), 104g carbs (29 fiber), 88g protein

No supper, no problem. It sure helps that I've turned my reds/greens into what seems like ice cream!

December 27

5a-pumpkin protein pancakes, 2c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-2c reg
8a-2c decaf
10a-3.5oz jerky, can diet ch coke
1145a-fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
1p(PWO)-Rice Nog protein shake
2p-oz almonds
230p-2c tea
3p-snack bar
430p-2c tea, oz almonds, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
7p-fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine, Met, reds, yeast, guar gum

Totals: 1482 cal, 51g fat (9 sat), 123g carbs (26 fiber), 121g protein

Skipped supper to help get back on track after the holiday derailment.

December 26

630a-2 fr eggs, 3oz smoked chicken, rice cake w/ T Sunbutter, c reg, Met, fish oil, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
8a-c reg
9a-egg white puffs w/ SF syrup, slice “bread,” waffle
10a-pumpkin custard, pudding, c decaf, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
1p-pork rib, smoked chicken, cauliflower & celery, hummus, flax pancake, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
7p-salad, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA, NC, Met, reds, yeast, guar gum

Totals: 2424 cal, 93g fat (25 sat), 134g carbs (40 fiber), 221g protein

Holidays over. This nonsense was brought on by experimenting with recipes and thinking it was okay to eat pretty much all of the results, pretty much immediately. Foolish!

I'll be linking to the ones that turned out to be worth making when I find some time.

December 25

530a-salad (peppers, cauliflower, peas, celery, romaine, balsamic), chicken breast, T BBQ sauce, 3c reg, T Sunbutter, 4oz Rice Nog, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA, Tyrosine
10a-fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
1p-smoked chicken, pork roast, pork rib, half sweet potato, baked carrots, pineapple, cranberry sauce, raw veg, “cheesecake,” 24oz diet dr pepper
3p-.5oz pistachios, few almonds, few apple chips, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
6p-oz almonds, few apple chips, sl dried mango
830p-fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA, Met, reds, yeast, guar gum, T Sunbutter

Totals: 2786 cal, 132g fat (41 sat), 265g carbs (43 fiber), 116g protein

More holiday nonsense.

December 24

5a-2c reg, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA, Tyrosine, 5 donut holes
730a(PWO)-omelet (3 eggs, ham, sausage, bacon, mushrooms, peppers, oninos), hash browns, 3c reg, multi, calcium, fish oil, ALC, CLA
9a-c reg, donut hole
1215p-2 eggs, chick saus, bacon-wrapped tenderloin, 2c decaf, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
3p-cheesecake (SF jello mix, coconut milk, Rice Nog, GF crumbs, soy butter, stevia), bacon-wrapped tenderloin, 2c decaf
4p-2c decaf, stevia, cinnamon extract
5p-ham, sausage & kraut, lil smokies, deviled eggs, 2 bottles diet A&W, black & green olives, grape tomatoes
930p-T Sunbutter, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA, Carnosine, Met, greens, yeast, guar gum
Totals: 3838 cal, 224g fat (74 sat), 243g carbs (51 fiber), 200g protein

Holiday nonsense.

Read This: JR Burgess

An emailed newsletter I received from JR Burgess of Rejuv Medical (Sartell, MN)

Some good stuff, worth a look in case you can pick up a nugget or two.


How to Recommit in the New Year!

 I want to ask how many people have made New Year’s resolutions?  How many of those New Year’s resolutions were successful, as in, you made it the whole year or accomplished your goal in the end? Don’t get me wrong, quitting smoking and sticking to it is amazing, and a definite life changer.
So now to answer the question, why we don’t like the idea of making a New Year’s resolution? It can seem like such as awesome idea, oh it’s the New Year and I am going to be a new me and make this generally unrealistic resolution.  Some research shows that most people will break their resolution within 10-14 days after the New Year begins. We see this all the time in the fitness industry. For the first two weeks after the new year, every gym in the U.S. is packed to the point that one can’t get on any piece of equipment.  But don’t worry if you are a die-hard, you know that after about two weeks most of those people drop out of the gym scene. Once an individual breaks their resolution, even one time, they look at it as failure and will continue to break it for the rest of the year. But what if we look at it as a lifestyle change and instead we set realistic goals for ourselves? When we “fail” once it is more like a bump in the road and we get right back on track the next day. So in the New Year let’s recommit instead of making a resolution. One way to do that is to figure out what motivates you and how to stay motivated.
Here is a list of ways to get and keep motivation this year:  
1.      Make sure to set goals that are realistic.  This goes back to the SMART model that was discussed two weeks ago.
2.      You should always keep track of where you started, where you are now, and where you are going. Look back at the past year and be proud of all the successes you attained. Paint a clear picture of where you want to go. The clearer the canvas of the future you, the easier your mind will unconsciously follow. Paint a masterpiece!
3.      Avoid the all-or-nothing thinking that was discussed in a previous Breaking Barriers. No one will ever reach complete perfection, remember that! There will be ups and downs; it’s how you get back on your feet. If it’s a busy time with family and you can’t make it to the gym as much, you can control your eating. When on vacation and eating healthy is less realistic, you can always find ways to move. Remember, you control you, and there is something good on every menu if you know how to ask for it.
4.      YOU are YOU; you are not the skinny gal on the treadmill next to you. Don’t compare yourself to anyone else in the gym. Focus on your goals and what you need to do to get the desired results you want.
5.      Seek support from anyone and everyone who wants to give it to you. Maybe a spouse, friend, or maybe it is necessary for you to get a personal trainer simply for the support and accountability.  When I meet with people to help them get started, I always ask who will be your support system.
6.      Find something that you enjoy doing. Exercise doesn’t always have to be running on a treadmill and lifting weights. It can be playing baseball in the yard with your kids or joining a volleyball league, Zumba, walking, skiing, riding bike, or a combination of many activities to avoid burnout.
7.      It is totally ok to do split workouts. Don’t have time to do an hour workout one day? Then do 30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes in the evening to make up for it. Even if you only have 20 minutes daily it much better than nothing. I love The Biggest Loser but you don’t have to do countless hours to be successful.  It’s finding what works for you. Do what is most convenient and if you are pressed for time, do what you can to squeeze a workout in. Maybe you can do body weight exercises in your home while you are preparing a meal because you are having company and won’t have the time to drive to the gym.
8.      Watching success leads to success. I ask all our clients to watch The Biggest Loser.  It starts January 3rd on NBC. Another television show, Heavy, on A&E is awesome. Thintervention, on Bravo with one of my favorite trainers, Jackie Warner, is a great show as well.  It’s inspiring to watch even the most desperate accomplish anything with the right program, support, mindset, and determination.
9.      Finding the right workout time. You should try to find a time that will work for you and make it become a habit. I would be terrible at getting my workouts in at the end of my work day, but that may work great for others. There is no right or wrong time; it’s what you can be consistent with.  My suggestion for busy parents is to try to get used to morning workouts. Get it done and over with, and you will feel great the rest of the day. I have belonged to many gyms and the 5 or 6 am groups are the ones you see year after year. It’s just become part of their lifestyle.
10.  Sugar takes away energy. If you eat a high sugar diet, or very unhealthy diet for that matter, you will burn out fast. Blood sugar spikes drain your energy and just make you want more sugar.  Too many people think they can still eat the addictive foods and the exercise will do the trick. I have seen it a thousand times; trust me, that answer is wrong. I have never wanted to go to the gym after a buffet.  Instead, I want to lie down and watch The Biggest Loser or Sports Center. Very few people can stick to an exercise routine without some healthy eating balance.
11.  Drop your false perceptions! I have heard “I hate gyms;  I can’t cook; I don’t have time; I can’t afford healthy foods; My family won’t eat this way, etc., etc.”  My point is if you think in terms of “can’t” and “don’t” you won’t. You have already convinced yourself of just that. The truth is you just have not learned. Every person that walks through our door we make a program specifically designed for them. If you dislike gyms, we will teach you how to work out in your own home. You can do quick and easy foods that require no cooking and still reach your goals. If you lack time you can probably eliminate something that is not as important as exercise, such as TV.  Eating healthy is not more expensive if you eliminate eating out and learn to shop smart like we teach. I know there are tons of recipes that our clients’ families love if you just take a step outside the box and try new things. Keep your mind open and develop a “can do” attitude and the sky is the limit!
12.  Never dwell on the past negative experiences. Think only of the opportunities that the future can provide you. If you failed a program before, discover what the reasons were and draw on it as a lesson learned. After failed relationships in my past, it drew me closer to what I needed, wanted, and what I have to work on in order to have a successful long-term marriage.
13.  Learn the right way! Do you know how many times I have heard the phrase, “I have tried everything!” Not one of those people has done what we would teach them. Your doctor doesn’t tell you to go on a fad diet.  They tell you to exercise and eat healthy, but that is the last thing people want to try. The problem is the doctor tells you to exercise and eat healthy, but doesn’t have the time to teach you exactly what that is. Everybody who follows a correct program has success if they truly follow it. The big challenge is making it stick long term. I promise you if you do a fad diet the weight will come back. If you go back to eating like you did previous to the diet, it will come back. Quick and easy will not work. I plea with everyone to start with a trainer who has the ability to teach you what a proper exercise and clean eating program can do for you. The treadmill alone will not work. Eating just salads and under eating calories is not eating healthy. Learn a complete program; it’s the only way to make a permanent lifestyle change!
14.  And lastly, remember that it is okay to reward yourself when you have reached a goal.  Maybe not with a chocolate cake but how about that pair of jeans you have been looking at for some time now. You reached a milestone and you are worth it, so BUY THEM!

This is the year you can make true to living a healthier life for you and your family! Please forward this e-mail to friends and family who are looking for some great changes this new year.


JR Burgess

December 23

5a-2c Hubbard squash, sl pineapple, 2 bacon-wrapped tenderloins, 2c reg, carrot w/ hummus, few apple chips, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA, Tyrosine
6a-c reg
8a-c reg, mini Snickerdoodle
12p(restaurant)-salad (turkey, ham, tomato, hb egg), 2c decaf
3p-entire bag of Nut Thins, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
430p-oz apple chips, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
630p-entire batch crab cakes, pint Arctic Zero, NC, Met, reds, yeast, guar gum, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA, Carnosine

Totals: 2478 cal, 90g fat (36 sat), 234g carbs (46g fiber), 170g protein

As you can see, I'm slipping into "holiday" mode. Whatever. 3 days of overeating won't cause too much damage. The trick is to keep it somewhat moderated, and then just thoroughly fucking enjoy it - not beat myself up about it.

I AM disappointed that I ate that tiny little snickerdoodle, though. Stupid irresistible sugar-laden goodness! It was delicious, but surely not worth any acne.

I used them to make a gift for my parents, celebrating their 35th anniversary. I stuck "congratulations!" candles, one into each cookie, so they could snack on them while driving to the Cities. Plus I made them scones - just trying to hold onto that "favorite daughter" award...

Paleo Crab Cakes: holy bloody hell, those were absolutely incredibly delicious. Recipe can be found here.

December 22

630a-4oz egg whites, 2oz pork sausage, 6 BWCs, 2T Bayou Bourbon, c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
7a-c reg, 4oz Rice Dream egg nog
730a-2c decaf
10a-2c chai tea, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
12p-salad (romaine, turkey, bacon, tomato)
1p-2c eggnoggn tea
2p-2c tea
430p(PWO)-3.5oz tilapia, .25c onions, c root veg, rice cake, s Sunbutter, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
7p(PWO)-Met, reds, yeast, guar gum, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine

Totals: 1461 cal, 58g fat (18 sat), 127g carbs (28 fiber), 94g protein

Another excellent day! No supper - strategic meal skipping to keep calories low.

December 21

5a-c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-c reg
630a(dWO)-s Ultima, BCAAs
730a-Americano w/ SF syrup
10a-2c reg, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
130p-2c chai tea
330p(pWO)-BCAAs, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
7p-few peanuts & candy corn, 5oz pork chop, c Hubbard squash, 3 carrots, 4T hummus, half small fresh apple, half dried apple, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine, Met, greens, yeast, guar gum

Totals: 862 cal, 26g fat (10 sat), 89g carbs (22 fiber), 59g protein

Fasted until supper and felt just fine! Brain is in a great place.

December 20

5a-scramble (4oz egg whites, 2oz pork sausage, c squash cubes, slice pineapple), c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
530a-c reg
615a-2 BWCs, c decaf, stevia
730a-2c decaf, stevia
930a-6oz chicken, 4 BWCs, protein shake, 2c decaf tea, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
130p(PWO)-5oz tuna, s sesame crackers, 2T mustard, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
430p-oz almonds
7p-salmon chowder, small apple, Met, reds, yeast, guar gum, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnsoine, NC

Totals: 1933 cal, 92g fat (35 sat), 98g carbs (21 fiber), 164g protein

Training day = high day. Since my back is doing so well, I'm going to fast tomorrow, so I tacked on a few extra calories...almonds and an apple, WOWEE!!

The fast day is an effort to make up for last week's dismal showing and get my brain over that, PLUS put it in a place where I can indulge at this weekend's family gatherings without any fretting.

I actually feel pretty good. Well-balanced. Happy.

Good friends and health improvements can do so much for the attitude...who knew?

December 19

5a-2 fr egg, chick saus, c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-c reg, 4oz almond milk
730a-Americano w/ SF syrup
10a-protein shake, oz cashews, 2c decaf, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
2p-salad, oz almonds, 2c decaf tea, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
3p-2c decaf tea
330p-2c decaf tea
6p-6oz chicken & c Brussels sprouts in .5T olive oil, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine, reds, Met, yeast, guar gum, flavor drops
730p-c decaf tea

Totals: 1578 cal, 82g fat (22 sat), 88g carbs (30 fiber), 119g protein

By the numbers, this day was a success...but mentally I struggled Physically I was okay, just on the lethargic/listless side, but my brain wanted absolutely nothing to do with anything or anybody. I left work at 4, went straight home, and straight to bed. A 1.5-hour nap helped some, but I remained spark-less last enthusiasm for anything.

Back is doing pretty well, so my concerns over that are staying within reason, dark alleys avoided, and will hopefully improve after talking with the chief at today's session.

Slight mental improvement today, but not yet my normal self. I'm feeling a little burned-out on absolutely everything, from calorie-counting to work to winter (which hasn't even started) to Christmas (confession: my least favorite holiday) to tax season (which, again, hasn't even started).

I blame tax season anxiety for all of it.

Today I am trying to remind myself that it's never as bad as I anticipate it to be, and there's no point in spending the next two weeks letting my anxiety build up and up and up, until it's a fucking tower of Pisa ready to crash on my curly li'l head.

My amazing girl Joy told me to think of it differently: it's Boston training season, not tax season. This I like! If I can focus on that instead, think of fueling, training, & recovering as an athlete who also happens to be working long hours, what a difference that could make. That puts work into a second-tier priority, which is right the fuck where it belongs. Health should be #1 at all times - it's the single thing in life that you truly can not survive without!

At any rate it sounds better than the way I was approaching it:
1. I want to lose fat (mental stress, physical stress)
2. and work 60 hours (mental stress, physical stress due to less/poor sleep)
3. and keep lifting (mental release but also physical stress)
4. and train for Boston (mental stress AND release, depending, and of course physical stress) it any wonder I expect to break, with this many stresses?

So, first and foremost: attitude.
Second: determine goals.
Third: consider obstacles.
Fourth: strategize.
Fifth: go forth!

Read This: Krista Scott-Dixon

An e-book titled "Fuck Calories"?

Oh, hell yes.

Love the disclaimer:

Yes, this book has cuss words. Many of them. Deal with it. Hey, it’s free. You get what the fuck you pay for.

December 18

645a-3.5oz tilapia, cooked onions, 2 waffles w/ SF syrup, sl GF toast, 11s BnPB, 2c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
930a(PWO)-2s Ultima, 2c reg, 1.5oz honey roasted cashews
11a-fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
1p-3oz turkey, 6oz prime rib, c celery sticks, c cole slaw, olives, pickles, cherry tomatoes, cooked baby carrots, 4c decaf
430p-fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
530p-3.5oz tilapia, cooked onion, 2s sesame crackers, .5c fresh salsa, waffle, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine, greens, Met, yeast, guar gum
6p-3 BWCs, c decaf
8p-NC, pint Arctic Zero

Totals: 3534 cal, 124g fat (27 sat), 399g carbs (35 fiber), 171g protein

If I could take away the BnPB at breakfast, today would've been just fine. At any rate, the jar is empty. No more willpower required.

God damn, I'm so in need of a Monday.

December 17

7a-2 fr eggs, chick saus, 2 sl GF toast, c chai tea, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
10a-2c decaf tea, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
1p-4c reg, 3 sl bacon, scramble(~2oz pork sausage, mushrooms, onions, peppers, 3 eggs), POM juice
430p-fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
7p-pork chop, pineapple, squash, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine, Carnosine, Met, reds, yeast, guar gum
9p-2 sl GF toast, 2T BnPB, T AB, hot cocoa & cinnamon

Totals: 2205 cal, 107g fat (37 sat), 131g carbs (27 fiber), 157g protein

Given that I hurt my back early in the day's training session, then had to watch my rockstar friend finish out "my" workout, then try not to freak the fuck out about how it will impact running and lifting and competing - this intake is gold-fucking-star-worthy.

But the good sense did not last...

December 16

645a-c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
730a-fr egg, chick saus, 2 waffles, syrup, c reg
930a-waffle, 2 sl toast, 2T fake PB, T apple butter, 2c decaf
10a-4oz Paleonola, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
2p-3T low-fat PB
3p-5oz Paleonola, T low-fat PB, 3 BW chestnuts, oz chicken, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
6p-salad, 6 BW chickens, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine, Met, greens, yeast, guar gum

Totals: 3386 cal, 174g fat (47 sat), 306g carbs (52 fiber), 146g protein

Paleonola = too good. Better 'n Peanut Butter = too good.

Don't keep this kind of stuff in your house because willpower always fails eventually. This is not news to me, and I don't know why I keep forgetting it.

Stopped the yogurt as of this day, and my skin immediately started to recover, really couldn't make it a more obvious connection. Sad.

December 15

6a-fr egg, chick saus, root veg, few water chestnuts & T bbq sauce, 2c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
7a-2c decaf
8a-Americano w/ SF syrup
10a-chicken leg, bacon-wrapped tenderloin, FiberOne yogurt, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
1130a-2c decaf chai tea
1p-2c decaf chai tea, 10 baby carrots, c celery, 1 BWC, 4 WC, 8 meatballs in sweet/sour sauce
230p-c celery
330p-3.5oz jerky, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
5p-med apple, few SP chips, 2s Sunbutter, T cashews
7p-chicken, GF pasta, marinara sauce, roasted veg, T cashews, 3c decaf
10p-s chicken sasusage, Met, reds, yeast, guar gum, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine, NC

Totals: 2819 cal, 109g fat (25 sat), 273g carbs (57 fiber), 181g protein

Felt physically awful, aching everywhere, worrying like crazy, and brain tanked in the afternoon. Calories ensued.


December 14

5a-c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-c reg
745a(PWO)-2c reg, BCAAs, 2s Mio
10a-2c decaf, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
130p(PWO)-BCAAs, s Mio
2p-2c decaf tea
330p-2c decaf tea, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA
530p-s Mio, .5s BCAAs
615p(PWO)-s Mio, .5s BCAAs
7p-salad w/ hb egg, yogurt, NC, Met, greens, yeast, guar gum, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, CLA, Carnosine
8p-few plain water chestnuts, half dozen in bacon, 2T bbq sauce

Totals: 857 cal, 24g fat (10 sat), 105g carbs (30 fiber), 38g protein

Lesson learned from today: three workouts, all fasted, FELT FINE. And all different: strength in morning, run at noon, yoga after work. Holy crap? Pretty cool thing to learn!

I decided to eat supper NOT because I felt crappy or snacky or anything - shockingly - but because I was feeling aches & pains a little more pronounced than I'd like. Went for a nice healthy vitamin-filled salad, threw in the yogurt for the dairy test, doing great! But then after making water chestnuts wrapped in bacon for a team potluck, I couldn't stop eating the fuckers. Most addicting stuff EVER. I even had to make a second batch because I ate so many! BACON.

But overall, no concerns with the day. In fact, this "half fast" might become a good substitute for a second fast day within one week. Stay tuned.

Acne: I had a tiny little pimple develop Sunday/Monday...which started to disappear by Monday eve, but has since started taking on cyst-like proportions...which points to the dairy already working away. GD! Leaving in the yogurt (two more servings) to make extra sure.

Habit: day two was a miserable failure. Nothing I had planned worked out, partly because of meetings & because I had to do further work on my goal (which I finished!), but the rest of the day was just FILLED with numerous little distractions. Refocusing for a new attempt today!

December 13

430a-2 fr eggs, chick saus, root veg, 2c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
530a-c decaf, oz apple chips
615a-c decaf
9a-2c decaf tea
10a-2c decaf, bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, rice cake & T Sunbutter, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
230p-salad, hb egg, 2 chicken legs, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
7p-2 slices GF French toast (coating made w/ yogurt, SF jello mix & fake PB-form fail!), SF syrup, 2s chick saus, 2c decaf, Met, reds, yeast, SF jello mix, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine
830p-3 pb cookies, T fake pb, oz walnuts
9p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 2433 cal, 100g fat (28 sat), 226g carbs (48 fiber), 152g protein

Yeah. Just before bedtime, when I should've just hauled my ass into the shower, I was feeling overwhelmingly snacky, damn near binge-level, and just plain miserable. So I thought up a compromise: go ahead and eat whatever, then fast on Wednesday. At that idea, I perked right up - fasting two days after I just did so sounded like a good might backfire and kick me in the ass, but even so, that would be a lesson learned.

What is fake PB? This stuff: Walden Farms Peanut Spread - it's basically assorted chemicals whipped up into in a calorie-free fluff that kinda sorta resembles peanut butter. It's not a true substitute for the real thing but can be made to work in a recipe or something (like as a dip for peanut butter cookies). I'm sure it's also probably 100% terrible for you, but if it keeps me from eating 1400 calories worth of sweet, delicious Subutter, well, to me it's worth the trade off.

Don't get too excited about their products - if you Google for reviews, you'll find that most of them seem to taste like ass. I've tried the PB and caramel dip, and found them to be tolerable substitutes; I've also tried the ranch dressing, which I threw away after one disgusting taste.

My theory on this chemical-laden shit is like so: if you're dieting down and avoiding calories and fueling your body with "just enough" to get by and mentally deprived and in danger of a binge, go ahead and eat it. If you're eating at a maintenance level and feeling fine and healthy and balanced, then avoid it. Eat real, whole, nutritious food.

Acne: I am now testing dairy in the form of yogurt. I bought the little 50-cal Fiber One yogurts both for the low calories and for the fact that the only dairy item listed was milk. I guess I could have just drank plain milk, but peach yogurt sounded much nommier.

Habit: Holy shit was I productive yesterday! I allowed myself a few minutes of fuck-around time first thing in the morning, at my two meals, and before leaving (at 530pm), and that was it. I had numerous moments where I would have replied to personal emails, or updated my food journal, or googled something - and instead I stopped myself and kept on working. And while I didn't get everything done (several work interruptions came my way), I did finish a monstrous goal write-up, which is huge. Maybe I'll get to take my PTO on Friday after all!

December 12

5a-c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-c reg, BCAAs
8a-2c decaf, BCAAs
10a-2c tea, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
1p-can diet cherry Coke, BCAAs
230p-2c reg
4p-fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
6p-fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine, Met, greens, yeast, guar gum

Totals: 327 cal, 10g fat (4 sat), 33g carbs (14 fiber), 12g protein

On this fast day, I taught my 630am strength class AND I ran at noon despite knees feeling a bit fat...and I felt great! I was SO FUCKING COLD though.

At home, my brain was in a perfect spot. I realized that I actually could have eaten supper since I was coming in 100 calories under my goal for average calories, meaning I could've eaten up to 700 calories for supper and still hit the goal. But amazingly, I rationalized that I truly felt fine without it, so why bother? Isn’t that a far cry from the weekend mentality!

I also I had a fair determination to stay fasted since I’d already calculated the weekly averages and didn’t want to have to re-do them! Sometimes laziness is motivating!

Week's tally:
- Averages: 1639 cal, 55g fat (14s at) 30%, 173 carbs (38 fiber) 42%, 103g protein 25%
- Up .28%, 5 cal avg, 32 total, from last week
- Burned 2772, up 228 from last week

Weight results:
- Down .2 lbs
- Down 1.2 lbs body fat (1%)
- Up 1 lb lean mass (.8 of it as water)

Because my brain is in such a good place today, I am able to focus on & believe the nice big body fat loss and ignore the tiny overall loss!

Acne: tiny wh on upper lip, but since it's nowhere near a cyst, I'm not sure it's even worth noting. I've had 3 cans of diet cherry Coke over the past 5 days, so perhaps that's the cause. At any rate, though, I don't intend to start a daily pop habit, and I feel confident that having one can every once in a great while won't make things go nuts. Good to know, but again: that doesn't mean it's going to become part of my regular diet. While it may not be the pure poison that some folks preach, I know this much: there is nothing in there that's good for me. But sometimes the brain beats you down and a diet cherry Coke is going to make you happy. And if skipping the pop means you go off and eat an entire bag of potato chips, well, perhaps the pop is the lesser of two evils.

And no, I will not say something like "Everything in moderation" to justify the occasional indulgence - that is a bullshit statement. Go try that with arsenic!

Habit: tea is now a given. I've got stashes like mad both at home and at my desk, and now I can't even walk past the tea display in motherfucking Target without stopping to peruse. So, time to flesh out the new one.

I've always got a running to-do list at work, with deadlines noted, but once close is complete and those deadlines are "way out" - I lose motivation and focus and basically develop Homer Simpson's attention span. (Oooh, a blue car!)

So, the new habit is going to be: first thing in the morning I designate my "MUST DO TODAY" items and get them done, no excuses. And absolutely no screwing around online or personal emails or any of that until these things are complete!

December 11

730a-2 fr eggs, turkey saus, 2 sl GF bread, 2c reg, supps
10a-oz chicken, 2 GF ciabatta rolls w/ balsamic
12p-2 waffles & SF syrup, 2c decaf, supps
230p-c tea
6p-salad (peppers, baby carrots, celery, spinach, cabbage), balsamic, hb egg, supp ice cream, supps
7p-Arctic Zero, 2oz apple chips
9p-few baby potatoes, 1/3c onions, bedtime supps

Totals: 2317 cal, 52g fat (14 sat), 354g carbs (49 fiber), 99g protein

I ate a nice large breakfast & lunch, intending to do just three meals rather than four. But they ended up a little too large, and I forgot about the ciabatta rolls when I planned waffles for lunch, and I was feeling extra snacky at supper, so then I made the decision to fast on Monday - which gave me leeway to allow a little more snacking as I packed up leftovers.

Holy carbs! Damn those wonderful ciabatta rolls (all gone now) and GF waffle mix (also all gone now) and homemade apple chips (not gone, and I plan to make more...gulp)!

December 10

8a-3oz pork roast, c baked potato, bbq sauce, 2c reg, cinnamon GF crackers w/ SF pudding mix as dip, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
10a-2c decaf, stevia
12p-Larabar, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
3p-VitaminWater Zero, BCAAs
7p-salad, 3 chicken legs, T Ole sauce, 2 GF ciabatta rolls, 2T Sunbutter, 3T apple butter, 15 GF cinnamon crackers, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine, Met, greens, yeast, guar gum
9p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 1916 cal, 67g fat (13 sat), 251g carbs (43 fiber), 73g protein

Powerlifting training means extra calories & carbs, and so I happily complied.

I discovered gluten- and dairy-free ciabatta rolls that are Really. Fucking. Good. And only 100 calories each. DANGEROUS!

December 9

5a-c reg
6a-c reg
7a-2c decaf, stevia, flavor drops, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
830a-2c decaf, stevia
930a-can diet cherry Coke
1030a-2c eggnogg’n tea, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
12p-2c ginger peach tea
2p-2c ginger peach tea w/ bag o’ herbs
230p-2c decaf tea, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
5p-2c cooked broccoli, salad w/ balsamic, 3c spaghetti squash w/ .25c sauce, choco crepes w/ SF syrup, turkey sausage, NC, 2c decaf, Met, reds, yeast, stevia, guar gum, multi, fish oil, CLA, ALC, Carnosine
9p-raw veg & hummus, pint Arctic Zero, 2 turkey patties

Totals: 1728 cal, 39g fat (12 sat), 201g carbs (60 fiber), 145g protein

Fast day that turned into a supper-only day. Unfortunately, once I ate, binge-like cravings kicked in. I ate a ton of vegetables & protein, knowing if I went for carbs it would turn into a full-on binge.


Read This: Shelby Starnes

Good article out on EliteFTS this week: Words of Wisdom

Great advice that applies to more than just wellness!

December 8

6a-2c broccoli, turkey patty, 2 fr eggs, 2T fresh salsa, 2c reg, stevia, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
7a-2c reg, t cinnamon, stevia
830a-Americano w/ SF syrup
9a-20z VitaminWater Zero
10a-bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, T BBQ sauce, sm apple, T Sunbutter, can diet cherry coke, krill oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
230p-chicken leg, rice cake, 2T Sunbutter, 15 baby carrots, c cauliflower, 2c decaf chai tea
4p-multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
6p-salad (cauliflower, grape tomatoes, baby carrots, celery, cabbage, spinach, balsamic), chicken wing & breast, NC, Met, greens, yeast, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine

Totals: 1877 cal, 76g fat (18 sat), 156g carbs (49 fiber), 133g protein

Been feeling rundown all week, and I'm blaming the deficit. I added a new dimension to my giant Excel file that tracks a rolling 7-day caloric intake, and yesterday was at 1603, which is fairly low for me.

I had to firmly combat the “It’s not fair” whiny-brain reaction with Leigh Peele’s commense-sense hard-love viewpoint that amounts to “It’s HARD and you WILL feel like crap. It's SIMPLE but it's not EASY. Deal with it.”

I know that I can’t risk feeling like this during tax season / Boston training, so now is the time to buckle down, suck it up, and make some serious progress!

I am keeping my goals right in front of my face (literally) and feeling confident. Go forth and kick ass, my friends!

December 7

5a-2-egg omelet, turkey patty, 2T salsa, 2c reg, stevia, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
6a-2c green tea, stevia
8a-decaf Americano w/ SF syrup
10a-bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, sm apple, rice cake, T Sunbutter, 2c decaf, stevia, flavor drops, krill oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
12p-2c decaf blueberry tea
230p-2 chicken legs, rice cake, 2T Sunbutter
4p-2c decaf bb tea, krill oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
730p-NC, Met, greens, yeast, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine

Totals: 1490 cal, 70g fat (16 sat), 80g carbs (23 fiber), 117g protein

This was kind of a tough day. 10.5-hours at work that were very busy (month-end close).

Once again I skipped a planned run. It was lovely out, and I wanted to WANT to run, but my legs & feet were achey and I just didn’t have the proper mindset to handle any running pain, should it happen.

After meal #3, my 2nd Sunbutter serving of the day, I very much wanted to finish the jar. This despite easily ignoring the jar for weeks. I used a Sharpie to write “NO!” on a post-it note, put it on top of the jar, then told Joy about it. She sweetly offered to hold it hostage if needed, but it wasn't necessary. Focusing on the reasons I shouldn't eat it and putting that tiny physical barrier up fixed my brain. What I asked myself: would I rather eat 3T of Sunbutter or be able to do more pullups? Pullups won!

I was feeling quite achey by end of the day, from my feet right on up to my back. Tired, even a bit sparkless when I left work. I literally could’ve fallen asleep at yoga. When I got groceries I was feeling a little stoopid, struggling big time to choose close treats for my team!

So at home I basically had two choices:
-Eat supper, hoping that extra calories would make me feel better.
-Fast as planned, cut down my to-do list and get to bed extra early, knowing that sleep would make me feel better.

I made the smart choice and was in bed by 830pm, before my husband had even gotten home from work! Although I didn't sleep very well, the extra hours have made a world of difference for me today. Feeling so damn smart!

Acne: still nothing. Next test to commence today. I am thinking Diet Cherry Coke.

Habit: I've chosen one, and it's going to be super hard, so I'm still working out the parameters I'll force myself into.

December 6

545a-2 fr eggs, turkey patty, 2c reg, stevia, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
630a-2c reg, stevia
730a-2c decaf, stevia
10a-2 chicken legs, 2 turkey dogs, s sesame crackers, 2c decaf tea, krill oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
230p-3oz bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, c butternut squash, sm banana, krill oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
5p-2c decaf tea
7p-fried egg sandwich on GF toast, turkey sausage, choco crepes w/ SF syrup, 2c decaf, Met, reds, yeast, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine
830p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 1821 cal, 71g fat (20 sat), 139g carbs (29 fiber), 143g protein

You know what's awesome? Breakfast for supper. It never fails to make me happy!

Still no acne flare-ups from the gum. Two more days allowed, then I test something else.

Habit: please suggest a new one for me!

Read This:

Interesting article explaining what happens when you eat sugar:

December 5

5a-fr egg, chick saus, 2c reg, stevia, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
6a-2c chai tea, stevia, BCAAs
8a-2c reg
9a-1.5c reg, Equal
1030a-1.5c reg
1215p-5oz tuna, 2T mustard, s sesame crackers, 4c decaf; krill oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
6p-3c romaine, T balsamic, chicken leg, pint Arctic Zero, NC, Met, greens, yeast, guar gum, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine
9p-Yogi bedtime tea, 5HTP
Totals: 1064 cal, 29g fat (11 sat), 87g carbs (23 fiber), 102g protein

Needed low calories but rather than fast for part of the day, I just ate extra-small (200-250 cal) breakfast & supper, & a normal lunch with my lovely visiting friend Terri. This worked fine, too! Clearly my brain is in a very good place that everything is working so easily.

Week's averages:
-1635 cal, 54g fat (18 sat) 30%, 145g cars (30 fiber) 36%, 128g protein 31%
-Down 38%, 995 cal avg, 6962 total, from last week
-Burned 2544, down 388 from last week

Weight is down 4.4 lbs, exactly what I was up last week after thanksbirthdaycation! I'm excited to see what two more hardcore weeks will produce. Stay tuned!

Acne: last night I had 3 pieces of the Trident gum that's in my desk drawer. This has red dye #40, which might also be the dye that my cousin & his daughter react to. Eeeeenteresting...

Habit: I seriously need to find a new one. This tea thing is too easy!

December 4

7a-4oz egg whites, t cinnamon, 1/8c SF syrup, 5oz pork chops, c sweet potatoes, T BBQ sauce, 2c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
830a-10 GF cinnamon crackers, 2c chai tea
11a-Vitamin Water Zero
12p-.5c cole slaw, 2 fried eggs, c hash browns, 4 small sausage links, broasted chicken breast, beef stew, 4c reg, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, 2s Ultima
6p-Met, reds, yeast, guar gum, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC, Carnosine
9p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 2253 cal, 104 fat (24 sat), 161g carbs (28 fiber), 150g protein

An interesting experiment today. I ate an extra-large 679-cal breakfast to fuel an 8-mile trail run/walk, then ate a giant 1341-cal belated birthday brunch with my pal Amy. And then I ate nothing else the rest of the day, because my calories were totally fucking blown out of the water.

Side note: I ate the buffet brunch w/ a no-holds-barred attitude, which is foolish to start with, but discovered a surprisingly high-calorie culprit: broasted chicken breast at a whopping 357 calories. Delicious, possibly worth the calories at a normal meal...but not after everything I'd already eaten!

Anyway, the lesson learned is: I never felt hungry after brunch. At all. I assumed that I'd have hunger pains to suffer through around supper time, but...I felt nothing. Interesting!

Acne: still no gum reaction. Testing the other flavor today.

Habit: easy peasy with the tea. Still haven't come up with a new one...haven't devoted much thought to it.

December 3

6a-3oz egg white, turkey dog, 3T fresh, 2c reg, stevia, Met, fsh oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium
7a-6oz chicken, 2T bbq sauce
10a-2T PB2, T cocoa powder, .25c SF pudding powder, .5oz raisins, t cinnamon, .125c GF graham crumbs, 10 GF cinnamon crackers, oz brown sugar jerky, fish oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium
2p-2.1oz jerky
4p-stevia, green tea/lemonade drink
430p-Met, greens, yeast, 4s SF pudding mix
7p-baked chicken leg, 3c spaghetti squash, .5c sauce, pint Arctic Zero, .5oz walnuts, t cinnamon, NC, fish oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium, Carnosine

Totals: 2086 cal, 54g fat (14 sat), 224g carbs (44 fiber), 143g protein

Stayed on the low end of my usual high range, with most calories in the morning to fuel a solid, fun lifting session. And I felt great all day, not at all deprived!

December 2

5a-2c reg, stevia, Met, fish oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium
7a-2c green tea, stevia
8a-2c decaf
10a-2c decaf peach tea, krill oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium
115p-2c decaf w/ stevia
2p-krill oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium
6p-Met, greens, yeast, guar gum, fish oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium, NC
7p-chicken leg & thigh w/ bbq sauce, romaine, carrots, celery, egg white crepes w/ SF syrup, 2c decaf, stevia

Totals: 630 cal, 20g fat (8 sat), 51g carbs (20 fiber), 50g protein

I ended the fast early & ate supper, as my upper right back got crazy tight as I drove home, a weird about-to-cramp feeling. Since I have a sweet heavy lifting session planned today, I gave my body what seemed like the best chance to get over it: heat pack, stretching, no pullups, and loaded up on protein & veggies. It seemed to work, as it feels MUCH better this morning. Yay!

Acne: still no reaction to the gum...huh.

December 1

6a-2 fr eggs, chick saus, 1.5c carnival squash, 2c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium
7a-2c chai tea
10a-salad, 6oz tilapia, 2c Tazo Passion tea, krill oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium
3p-3c spaghetti squash*, .5c sauce, krill oil, multi, ALC, CLA, calcium
630p-romaine, carrots, celery, balsamic (resisting the amazing smell of slow-cooker ribs while waiting for the hubster to get home = torture)
7p-9.25oz ribs, 1.5c carnival squash, NC
815p-Met, reds, yeast, guar gum

Totals: 1869 cal, 72g fat (30 sat), 175g carbs (35 fiber), 125g protein

*An EXCELLENT dieter's meal: 3c spaghetti squash + .5 sauce = 216 calories. That's a whopping 537 calories fewer than you'd have with three cups of pasta noodles. While it's not exactly the same texture/flavor as pasta, it's very filling, it's delicious, and it doesn't feel the least bit restrictive! (Unless perhaps you are seriously craving that case, your cravings might hang 'round.) You could probably cut even more calories if you have a homemade sauce; I had Prego.

Habit: SO EASY, seriously. Tea is awesome. I haven't yet figured out a new habit, but I believe I will. I'm on a freaking roll here!

Acne: I had one more piece of gum, to make three within 24 hours. If this is an acne cause, my skin should freak out on Saturday/Sunday...hold me. If not, I'll be testing the other gum brand next.

View This: Photoshopped Pics

Don't compare yourself to celebrities and magazine ads.

You'd look absolutely perfect if we Photoshopped you, too:

November 30

430a-2 fr eggs, 2s chick saus, 2c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, ACL, CLA, calcium
545a-2c green tea
745a-2c decaf
830a-Americano w/ SF syrup
10a-chicken breast w/ onions, sm apple, 2c decaf herbal tea, fish oil, multi, ACL, CLA, calcium
3p-rice cake, T Sunbutter
420p-6oz fish, sm apple, fish oil, multi, ACL, CLA, calcium
7p-2c romaine, T balsamic, turkey patty, c potatoes, Met, greens, guar gum, yeast, fish oil, multi, ACL, CLA, calcium, Carnosine
9p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 1989 cal, 75g fat (26 sat), 138g carbs (28 fiber), 185g protein

Yesterday I felt like I was physically falling apart. Lateral knee pain on my run, sore lower back, fatigued upper back, tight hams - and two straight days of only 6.5 hours in bed. My mental state was OKAY, but I was definitely lacking in my usual energy. So rather than skip meal #4 as planned, I ate a well-rounded whole-food meal. This means adjusting the plan to a little less indulging over the weekend, absolutely no big deal.

Huge improvements should take place today -
  • Physical:
    • Last night I was in bed a whopping (necessary) (much-needed) 8.75 hours.
    • My digestive system has recovered from the trail mix bar I ate on Tuesday, which contained oats, which I should never eat. Idiot.
    • Training w/ Dustin today, which always leaves me feeling fantastic.
    • High calorie day will take place as planned.
  • Mental:
    • Last night at yoga Sarah Roers joined our Ragnar Relay team.
    • This morning I had an email telling me Dustin & Mike are on our Ragnar team. That leaves just one female opening to fill. 
    • Even better, the 11 that we have are guaranteed to make it super fun!
    • Today is my 10-year dating anniversary with the man I love. Ribs for supper, at home, where there is no ingredient anxiety or looking pretty required!
Habit: seriously, this tea thing is so simple. Just have it everywhere, and it is an easy choice to make! Helps that winter is starting and hot tea just sounds like a fantastic option at pretty much any hour. Hell, I think it might even be time to tackle a new habit. Will have to debate on what that might be...

Acne testing: last night I had two pieces of gum. Gulp.

November 29

530a-chick saus, beets, egg white omelet, slice GF toast w/ T apple butter, 2c reg, Met, CLA, calcium, fish oil, multi
645a-2c green tea
8a-2c decaf
11a-12oz (!) tuna, 2T mustard, 2 sl GF bread, small apple, CLA, calcium, fish oil, multi
245p-bag apple chips, trail mix bar, CLA, calcium, fish oil, multi
7p-2c Yogi bedtime tea
8p-Met, reds, yeast, guar gum, CLA, calcium, fish oil, multi, Carnosine, ACL
9p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 1553 cal, 27g fat (10 sat), 180g carbs (31 fiber), 139g protein

Back to serious dieting!

This week's goal is to average 1650 calories, even while celebrating my 10-year [dating] anniversary on Thursday by going out to supper Saturday AND having a birthday meal with my long lost pal Amy.

This can will accomplished with the following plan:
-Tue 1450 cal
-Wed 1450 cal
-Thu 1850 cal
-Fri 250 cal (fast day)
-Sat 2650 cal
-Sun 2250 cal
-Mon 1450 cal
=1621 calorie average.

Love me the flexibility provided by a fast day! Sat & Sun have a ton of calories available, so I can eat out without being super strict, and fuel a powerlifting workout and a nice long run as well.

But as you can see, I already exceeded Tuesday's calories by 100, and I'm planning to do the same today - because I'm running on two nights of too-little sleep. And that makes the projected average 1654 - right on target!

November 28

5a-fr egg, chick saus, c sweet potatoes, c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-c reg, stevia
8a-c reg, c decaf
9a-2c decaf, flavor drops
10a-5oz tuna, 2T mustard, s crackers, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium
 3p-salad, 4 stuffed clams, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium
 7p-20oz SoBe LifeWater, 2c decaf w/ SF syrup
10p-2 turkey dogs, sl GF bread, 2T ketchup, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, NC, 5HTP

Totals: 1398 cal, 43g fat (12 sat), 154g carbs (22 fiber), 93g protein

Week in review:
- Average intake: 2629cal, 122g fat (33 sat) 42%, 235g carbs (37 fiber) 36%, 150g protein 23%
- Up 66%, 1050 cal avg, 7351 total, from last week
- Burned 2932, down 21 from last week

My weigh-in this morning was another water-loggged one, and it made me laugh:
+4.4 lbs
-1.8% fat
-1.6 lbs fat
+ 6 lbs lean mass
+4.6 lbs water

That's what 4 straight high-carb days will do to you. So this week's weigh-in is basically pointless, other than to gain perspective. After a weeklong return to normalcy, THEN I'll have numbers with a reasonable level of accuracy. Until then, I just have to accept that my pull-ups & chin-ups will suffer since they are weighted!

Went to the Cities and picked up a new toy last night: squat rack, barbells, 400# weights. Forget about paying for the Y when free passes run out...I can now lift in my own basement!

Habit: I forgot to drink any tea most days of my Thanksbirthdaycation, but I'm now back on track! Also, I absolutely attribute my first habit efforts for my ability to maintain perspective all weekend, being able to think "This bloat is temporary, it will disappear soon" and not dwelling on my stomach at all. That's huge.

Acne update: tested evaporated milk last week with the pumpkin pie/custard. I do seem to have two blemishes coming through, but one started Wednesday night (too soon for the milk to be blamed), and one surfaced just yesterday...which seems like quite a delay, so I'm not really sure what to blame for either one!

Victory: two straight binge-free weeks. Yeah!!

November 27

And Thanksbirthdaycation comes to a close with one final day of indulgences...

730a-3oz Paleonola, 2c reg
8a-3 scrambled eggs, 2 sausage links, 4 sl bacon, sl ham, .5c potatoes, 2 cubes watermelon, slice pineapple, 2 cubes honeydew, 2 cubes cantaloupe, 2c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
9a-2c reg
1p-1/4 pumpkin pie, salad of romaine, carrots, celery, Reese’s Pieces cookie, pint Arctic Zero, 2c decaf, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
8p-stuffed clam, 3oz pork chop, .5c sweet potatoes, 2 GF pb cookies, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine
9p-4 FiberSmart

Totals: 2823 cal, 152g fat (46 sat), 261g carbs (36 fiber), 127g protein

It was a good run. I got in everything I'd been craving, enjoyed every bite, and have zero guilt or regret. The weekend's calories fueled a 5k win, a kickass lifting workout, and my brain.

And now, it's time for 3 solid hardcore weeks until the 4-week cycle + all the family Xmas gatherings demand that I indulge again!

November 26

Thanksbirthdaycation weekend continues with an impressive tally...

630a-2c reg, Sunbutter crunch bar; 8a-3-egg omelet w/ veg & meat, hash browns, 2c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
1130a(PWO)-Paleonola, pistachios
1230p-12 bbq wings, fries, 1.5c decaf, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
5p-oz pistachios
7p-3 breadsticks (Daiya cheese, wheat crust), pizza w/ canadian bacon, pineapple, green olive, Daiya cheese & GF crust*
9p-greens, yeast, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine

Totals: 3764 cal, 217g fat (49 sat), 300g carbs (36 fiber), 168g protein

*I've been waiting to return to this pizza place since the Fargo Marathon. And it was every bit as delicious as I was anticipating!!

November 25

And Friday transitioned into Thanksbirthdaycation weekend...

6a-1/4 pumpkin pie, 6oz bacon-wrapped pork tenderloins, .25c sweet potatoes, 2c reg, stevia, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
9a-3oz Paleonola, 2c decaf, stevia, carrots, hummus
1p-Creole tilapia, roasted zucchini, spaghetti squash, 2c decaf, supps
430p-2c green tea, 2oz Paleonola, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
730p-pulled pork, 4 ribs, cole slaw, fries, 2c decaf

Totals: 3116 cal, 164g fat (43 sat), 230g carbs (30 fiber), 140g protein

November 24

6a-fr egg, chick saus, 2 sl bread, 6 GF donut holes, half pumpkin custard, 4oz Paleonola, 2c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
9a(PWO)-4c reg, oz SF syrup, 12 Jamie Eason cookies
1p-20oz SoBe LifeWater, 5oz deep-fried turkey, baked potato, T brown gravy, .5c sweet corn, 3T cranberries, 3.25oz jerky
3p-20oz SoBe
4p-10 baby carrots, .5c cauliflower, 8 dill pickles
6p-Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
7p-3oz turkey, 3oz ham, romaine w/ carrots, celery
8p-1/4 pumpkin pie, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine
Totals: 3198 cal, 133g fat (37 sat), 321g carbs (51 fiber), 197g protein

Yes, I wrote everything down, but I was not moderating - I ate whatever the fuck I wanted to eat. Happy THANKSBIRTHDAY to me!

I wasn't expecting it to be this much, but in addition to my [planned] giant holiday meals, I also overate at breakfast. Pre-race nerves, I guess. But perhaps that was the secret to being the overall female winner in the Turkey Day 5k!

On my way home from the race, I literally started crying. I won a 5k, on my birthday.

Felt so lucky since I didn’t really train, so grateful that the “right” competition showed up, and I guess I just plain still have gaps of reconciling who I am versus who I used to be. Funny how many people were very moderated in congratulating me, or didn't seem fazed that I won. Meanwhile, me, my husband, my parents - all over-the-moon impressed. Because they know where I came from and see how massive this is for me to achieve!

Fun anecdote: lunch was at my brother's, where dessert was pumpkin pie that I couldn't eat. Instead, my brother gave me a bag of teriyaki beef jerky. That fucking ruled.

I don't think anything could have made this birthday better!

November 23

430a-2 fr eggs, chick saus, 2 sl GF toast, 4 GF donut holes, 2c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-2c decaf, stevia
8a-2c decaf
12p-4.5oz chicken, 2c romaine, 4T fresh salsa, 1/4c black olives, 3c reg
1p-2.6oz apple chips, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
4p-5oz tuna, 2T mustard, s sesame crackers, 2c chai tea, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
7p-3oz bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, med apple, 2T SF caramel, 6 GF donut holes, c hot cocoa, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, Met, reds, yeast
830p-pumpkin custard

Totals: 2064 cal, 68g fat (27 sat), 212g carbs (39g fiber), 152g protein

Had planned only 3 meals for today, was going to skip supper in anticipation of tomorrow's high calories. But I spent the day feeling a bit tired, hams quite tight. Made sure to drink a ton of water and added calories so that I am in tip-top shape for my birthday 5k in the morning!

Here’s a super amazing thing: my skin is VERY clear lately, I wore hardly any foundation today. I couldn't tell you the last time I didn't wear full-fledged foundation out in public (besides a run). It's a wonderful, incredible feeling.

And on that note, time to test and see if I ruin the lovely skin. Right now I've got pumpkin pie baking, which contains evaporated milk. If I simply re-confirm the dairy reaction, well, at least I'll be enjoying some delicious birthday pumpkin pie in the meantime!

...and I ate 1/4 of this pumpkin pie just before bedtime. Oops!

November 22

5a-2 fr eggs, 2s chick saus, 2c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-2c decaf, stevia; 8a-2c decaf; 9a-2c reg, stevia
10a-3oz bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, c cooked cabbage, 2c decaf, stevia
11a-5 GF chocolate donut holes, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
430p-cinnamon apple spice decaf tea (pure deliciousness - thanks, Joy!!)
6p-salad, chicken soup, cinnamon apple spice decaf tea, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, Met, greens, yeast, guar gum, pint Arctic Zero
7p-s Sunbutter, T apple butter, 2 sl GF bread, 2c decaf
830p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 1906 cal, 73g fat,(19 sat), 147g carbs (40 fiber), 163g protein

Meetings from 2-430 meant I couldn’t get my 3rd meal, so I just skipped it, and FELT FINE. Then I overate at supper in order to get my calories back up to plan. Normally I'd have taken a bonus low day, but I want maximum recovery after today's training so that I'm ready to kick ass in my birthday 5k!

Habit: tea intake has been consistent and easy. And today my tea queen buddy Joy inter-officed me a bundle of teas so I'm all set to find some tasty brews!

November 21

5a-beets & egg whites, chick saus, 2 sl GF bread, 2c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
6a-2c pumpkin spice tea
730a-SF Americano
10a-3oz pork chop, .75c sweet potatoes, .25c apples, 6 almonds, 2c decaf, stevia, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
330p-5oz tuna, 2T mustard, sesame crackers, med apple, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
630p-c Brussels sprouts, c cooked cabage, 3.6oz roast beef, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, Met, reds, yeast, guar gum
8p-NC, 5HTP

Totals:1803 cal, 53g fat (14 sat), 184g carbs (37 fiber), 140g protein

Perfectly on plan!

Weekly numbers:
-Averaged 1585 cal, 42g fat (14 sat) 24%, 176g carbs (36 fiber) 44%, 120g protein 30%
-Down 12%, 224 cal avg, 1566 total, from last week
-Lowest average in nearly three years!
-Total burned 2953, down 61 from last week
-2011 avg YTD: 2011 cal, 86g fat (18 sat), 189g carbs (33 fiber), 127g protein

November 20

6a-fr egg, chick saus, 2 sl toast, c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
730a-c decaf chai tea
1045a-3oz bacon-wrapped pork loin, bag apple chips, oz jerky, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
5p-salad, 4oz pork chop, .75c sweet potatoes, .25c apples, sm apple, T SF caramel dip, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, Met, yeast, reds, c Arctic Zero
8p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 1657 cal, 43g fat (15 sat), 191g carbs (41 fiber), 127g protein

Stayed quite a bit under my planned calories (2300, I think it was). Granted, I was busy at training all morning, and took a 2-hour nap in the afternoon, but I never felt snacky or deprived. Kick ass!

Read This: Matt Lentzner

Interesting read about how food can be two of these three things: easy, fast, or healthy.

  1. cheap and healthy, but not fast
  2. fast and healthy, but not cheap
  3. fast and cheap, but not healthy

If you find the rare food that is all three, eat it up - and tell me about it!!

November 19

5a-egg whites & beets, chick saus, small apple, 2T caramel dip, 2c reg, Met, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
630a-2c decaf, stevia
10a-bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, sm apple, bag apple chips, 2c reg, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
330p-Bayou Bourbon meatloaf, squash pancakes, SF syrup, c carrots, 4T hummus, 2c decaf, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
730p-salad, 4oz pork chop, c sweet potatoes, c apples, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, Met, yeast, reds, guar gum, c Arctic Zero, 2c mulled spices
10p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 2411 cal, 62g fat (25 sat), 298g carbs (59 fiber), 160g protein

A high day just as planned. Got a great lifting session in so all those calories ought to go straight to muscle, yeah? And if not, at least my brain is happy!

Now, it seems crazy to me that it was this high, because it's not like I loaded up on carbs & crap. But here's the high-calorie sources:
  • 5oz meatloaf = 444 cal
  • 4oz pork chop = 226 cal
If I'd had fish or poultry, I'd be looking at ~125 calories. So those are the best choices for low days - which is why I have 12oz of tilapia & 6 stuffed clams for next week!

Habit: 2c tea today!

Read This: Cookie Monster

A strategy to combat cravings:

Emotional Eating: Using “Later” to Overcome “Now”

November 18

5a-c reg, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Tyrosine
7a-c reg, stevia
9a-2c Sleepytime tea
10-2c green tea
1p-c mulled spices
230p-c mulled spices, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC
430p-can Zevia
530p- CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, Met, greens, yeast, gum, 2c Yogi bedtime tea, stevia
9p-NC, 5HTP

Totals: 260 cal, 6g fat (4 sat), 39g carbs (10 fiber), 11g protein

Fast day with SIX CUPS of tea. Felt decent all the way through, though certainly hungry when I walked through not one but TWO grocery delis just before noon. Glutton for punishment, I guess. Napped two hours after a doctor's appointment that left me crampy & feeling awful, but the nap definitely helped.

My only "failure" was canceling a planned run. I just didn't feel up to it mentally, most likely due to the fast. Normally I wouldn't care one whit, but I am running a 5k on Thursday and haven't spent nearly enough time running fast lately, so I'm getting a little nervous. Forcing myself out there might have helped settle my nerves somewhat...or it might have gone poorly like it always does when I'm not up for it. Wasn't worth the risk.

I also made a ton of food which might seem like a cruel thing to do on a fast day, and I'll admit to being hungry while doing so, but it turns out to be genius since it 100% prevents snacking!

Here's a list:
-four salads
-slow cooker roast beef
-tilapia & onions
-chicken breakfast sausage
-stuffed clams
-steamed cabbage

I think I am stocked up on food all the way to next Sunday. Awesome.

November 17

5a-4 sl French toast, stevia, cinnamon extract, SF syrup, sm apple, 2c reg, Met, fish oil, multi, calcium, CLA, ALC
6a-2c pumpkin spice tea
7a-2c decaf
10a-5oz tuna, 2T mustard, sesame crackers, CLA, fish oil, multi, calcium, ALC, 2c YerbaMate
4p-3oz bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, 2s roasted veg, CLA, krill oil, multi, calcium, ALC, 2c decaf chai tea, stevia
7p-3oz bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, pint Arctic Zero, Met, reds, yeast, CLA, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, fish oil, multi

Totals: 1863 cal, 40g fat (14 sat), 218g carbs (48 fiber), 150g protein

Right on plan, right on target, and very easy to stick with, being a high day. I nearly skipped my 4pm meal since I felt so good, but did not want to take any risks that might up my chances of crashing. I even felt pretty stuffed at supper, no deprivation feelings whatsoever.

Habit: 6 cups tea. Easy peasy!

Bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin: on sale at Pete's, 3 for $4, and delicious. Go stock up!

Pumpkin Spice Arctic Zero: fucking phenomenal. So glad I bought all 5 pints that Pete's had stocked...sorry for being so greedy!!

I was awake at 330am again both Wednesday Thursday, so yesterday I decided to head home after training, take a nap, then jump online and finish working. GENIUS. The nap was much-needed and definitely helped. It can be hard to admit that I just can't get by on less than 8 hours of sleep, but what the fuck is the point of acting tough and suffering? And when it later leads almost directly to a binge, which thwarts my goals and beats down my brain, it's clear that sleep has to be a priority for me.

Know your weaknesses, learn from them, and strategize to compensate.

November 16

445a-roasted veg, chick saus, sl toast, T Sunbutter, 2c reg, stevia, Met, fish oil, multi, CLA, calcium, ALC
6a-sm apple, c decaf chai
8a-2c decaf, stevia
10a-SF Americano, salad, hb egg, med apple, rice cake, T Sunbutter, CLA, krill oil, multi, calcium, ALC
12p-2c decaf green tea
2p-2c decaf, stevia
330p-5oz tuna, 2T mustard, sesame crackers, sm apple, CLA, calcium, ALC
7p-Met, greens, yeast, CLA, calcium, ALC, Carnosine, fish oil, multi
9p-5HTP, Tyrosine, 4 FiberSmart

TOTALS: 1415 cal, 42g fat (12 sat), 167g carbs (35 fiber), 90g protein

3 decent, filling meals, no supper. And I felt perfectly fine, not remotely deprived!


New habit: I had THREE cups of tea yesterday! And used that as an excuse to buy pumpkin spice tea last night. I love pumpkin-flavored stuff and wish that companies stopped considering it to be seasonal. I mean, come on, I'd eat pumpkin pie in May! Speaking of, if anyone has the perfect pumpkin pie recipe to share, please do!

Old habit: even better. I had an absolutely fucking amazing body-image moment after teaching class yesterday morning. I was wearing tight capris that cause a little bit o' belly-flab spillover, which was visible since I was also wearing a very tight tank (normally I'd go with a looser tank to hide it). I looked in the mirror and noted the belly flab, but then stopped myself and looked objectively, and pondered what my thoughts would be if this body belonged to another woman.

I decided it wasn’t “Look at that belly fat” but rather “Nice arms. Nice shoulders. Nice back." And even, for the first time ever, "Nice ass!”

I can't properly convey what this mental shift means to me, as my body image has always been ferociously critical. And I mean FEROCIOUS. Now, I’m still not content with where my body comp is, I still want that little bit of belly flab to go the fuck away, but I’m not filled with hate/anger/frustration every time I look down… I don’t really have words to describe how immense this shift is.

Read This: Metabolic Effect

Really concise explanation on how you can achieve those elusive six-pack abs:

So You Want a Six Pack?

It's pretty simple, actually - but guess what? Simple ≠ easy!

November 15

530a-turkey egg (thanks, Joy!), chick saus, 2 sl toast, c reg, Met, fish oil, multi
645a-c reg, stevia
715a-2c decaf
845a-2c decaf
1030a-5oz tuna, sesame crackers, 2T mustard, apple
330p(PWO)-apple, 3.1oz jerky, krill oil, multi
630p-7oz chicken, ~20 baby carrots, ~2T sauce, romaine salad
830p-Met, reds, yeast, fish oil, multi, CLA, Calcium, ALC, Carnosine, NC
9p-5HTP, Tyrosine

Totals: 1753 cal, 48g fat (13 sat), 145g carbs (22 fiber), 166g protein


Habit update! I honestly feel like I've conquered the constant belly hate. It helps that I'm making body comp progress, but I know damn well that the mental shift has been a huge impact.

So now I'm starting another new habit: drink a cup of tea every day. Any tea: green, black, Sleepytime, whatever. Simple. Physical, not mental, this time, as I feel like my brain is on an upward spiral. Plus, I always want to buy more when I see the array of tea choices at the Grain Bin, but I already have a massive stash of it that I rarely drink. Time for that to change!


Scale note: I just realized that yesterday's weigh-in was exactly the same as when I started training with Dustin 2 years ago. If that isn't a perfect example of why NOT to focus on the scale, then nothing is. FAT LOSS is what you're after, not weight loss!


And finally, based on what I read in Mastering Leptin, I once again have a new diet plan. I feel like I'm the QUEEN of new plans, but hey, if it isn't working, try something else. Definition of insanity and allathat.
  • I will make the effort to nap both Saturday & Sunday, whether or not I feel like I need it at the time. (Basically, don't wait until I crash to catch up on sleep.) Also since I have a lot of upcoming Fridays off to burn up my PTO: bonus nap day!
  • Add recommended supplements (calcium, CLA, ALC, & Carnosine) that should help with my specific hormonal issues.
  • Make every effort to only work 40 hours per week, not 45-50 hours as is my tendency. Use that extra time for reading and relaxing! Tax season is right around the corner, after all.
  • Stop with the all-day grazing and instead eat 3 or 4 meals. Make Friday a fast day. Works out as follows:
    • Tuesday: 4 meals x 400 calories each + supps = 1850 calories
    • Wednesday: 3 meals x 400 calories each + supps = 1450 calories
    • Thursday: 4 meals x 400 calories each + supps = 1850 calories
    • Friday: supps = 250 calories (fast day)
    • Saturday: 3 meals x 400 calories each + 1 meal x 800 calories + supps = 2250 calories
    • Sunday: 3 meals x 400 calories each + 1 meal x 800 calories + supps = 2250 calories
    • Monday: supps = 250 calories (fast day)
This plan averages 1427, which is likely too low to feel good, which means there is leeway for extra calories as needed, based on workouts or sleep or whatever - or I can skip the Monday fast. Build it low, knowing that in reality it will always be higher.

My specific plan to combat binge urges: drink a quart of water, eat a BAS (Big Ass Salad*) but only if I actually need calories, and take a nap. Keep it simple; the body needs rest and fluids and perhaps some quality nutrition, but it definitely doesn't need the massive influx of food the brain is pushing for.

*Note: Mark's salad is significantly higher in calories than I need. Subract the pine nuts, avocado, and dressing, and that's where I land.

Recipe: Thanksgiving Meals

Whole9 shares a ton of drool-worthy Thanksgiving recipes:

Why not try making at least one of these for your family feast? Or, hell, make one tonight!

November 14

5a-c reg, Met, multi, fish oil
6a-c reg, c decaf
745a-2c decaf
9a-2c decaf
1230p-2c decaf, stevia, krill oil, multi
730p-c decaf chai tea, Met, greens, yeast, fish oil, multi, FiberSmart
9p-NC, 5HTP, Tyrosine

Totals: 260 cal, 7g fat (0 sat), 34g carbs (12 fiber), 15g protein

Fast day, imagine that. Not enough to get me to my goals for the week, but makes up for three straight days of failure.Was very tired and cold all day, worse than usual fasts. Left work at bit early and napped 5-7.

Acne update: tested excess caffeine in the form of 2-4 extra cups of regular coffee for three straight days. No reaction.

November 13

8a-1.5oz Paleonola, 2 fr eggs, chick saus, 2c reg, stevia
930a-2c decaf
1p-waffle, SF syrup, 2c decaf, stevia, oz Paleonola
3p-oz Paleonola
430p-eggplant pancake batch
5p-can tuna, sesame crackers, T mustard, pint Arctic Zero
7p-hot cocoa, Zevia, 2.5oz Paleonola, fish oil, multi

Totals: 2687 cal, 148g fat (36 sat), 241g carbs (47 fiber), 134g protein

Did better at avoiding between-meal snacking, except for finishing off that GD Paleonola!

November 12

8a-2 egg bake, 2 sl toast, 2c reg, stevia
9a-2c reg w/ SC syrup
10a-2c reg
12p-Subway sandwich piece, baby carrots, celery, grape tomatoes
330p-2 Subway sandwich pieces
430p-pint Arctic Zero
530p(PWO)-2oz Paleonola
630p-salad, broiled walleye, roasted veg, c decaf
8p-multi, fish oil
9p-2oz Paleonola, reds, yeast, Met

Totals: 2276 cal, 77g fat (18 sat), 258g carbs (46 fiber), 93g protein
Once again tried to skip snacks but fell apart in afternoon. Low sleep. Weekend. GD.

You may know I fucking love bread? Too tired to resist the leftover sandwiches that I tried bringing home to the hubster. Paleonola is really fucking good, basically nuts & seeds flavored with natural sweetness. I don't recommend it unless you are able to resist such things. My other pouches are now in the basement. Out of sight, out of mind. I hope.

Tiny victory: I ordered the walleye at supper, when you know god damn well that I wanted ribs.

November 11

From here to the rest of the weekend: do as I say, not as I do.

630a-2 egg bake, 2c reg, s orejitas, Sunbutter bar
7a-2c decaf, stevia
9a-2c decaf
10a-2c reg
11a-c SF green tea
12p(Mongo’s)-3oz tilapia, .5c ea carrots, celery, gr peppers, red peppers, 5oz sauce, 2t curry, 2c decaf, Sunbutter bar
5p-chicken & veg, s orejitas, fish oil, multi
8p-egg white pizza, Met, greens, yeast
9p-snack bag kettle corn
10p-snack bag kettle corn
12a-2s Ultima
1a(PWO)-2 fr eggs, chick saus, sl toast, 2c decaf

Totals: 2340 cal, 86g fat (18 sat), 239g carbs (37 fiber), 141g protein

Rather than my morning fast plan, I instead decided to try a no-snack plan due to what I'd learned in Mastering Leptin. It went fine until I started in on the anxiety snacking before my 11pm run, then topped it off by eating again when I got home, rather than going straight to bed. Stupid brain.

November 10

430a-2 fr eggs, 2.5oz chicken, English muffin, c reg, Met, fish oil, multi
6a-.25oz pistachios, c reg
7a-2c decaf, stevia
830a-snack bag kettle corn, .5oz almonds
11a(PWO)-1.5oz jerky
12p-salad w/ hb egg (brought own to potluck, took bit o’ ham & tomato for it), Zevia, 2c decaf, fish oil, multi
4p-2s egg bake
6p-salad, hb egg, 1.25oz pistachios, 2.5oz chicken, snack bag kettle corn, fish oil, multi, Met, reds, yeast
8p-roasted veg, NC
9p-5HTP, Tyrosine

Totals: 1768 cal, 69g fat (12 sat), 181g carbs (46 fiber), 130g protein

Should've avoided those pistachios,& carbs higher than they needed to be, but a perfectly healthy day.

Recipe: Supplement "Ice Cream"

Every night I have a mix of supplements that is comprised of:
-1.5t Metamucil
-T greens or reds (I alternate days)
-1.5t brewer's yeast
-s stevia on greens days

Last night I added ice & guar gum & basically made it into ice cream!

-My greens & reds are homemade mixes from dried fruits/veg that I bought off a while back, but you can buy these powders pretty much anywhere.
-If you don't want/care for greens & reds, this should totally work for protein powder as well.

So here's how I did it:

I put my usual powders into the Magic Bullet plus a generous pinch of guar gum (I saw xanthum recommended [on Emily Zaler's site] but I had guar gum [I have no idea why, it was unopened!] which worked just fine). I then added an entire tray's worth of ice cubes (um, about 3-4 cubes too many, so maybe leave a free inch or so at the top). Then I added about 2 oz water, and my Bullet was struggling to chew up the ice cubes (probably didn't help that it was CHOCK FULL), so I added about 2 more oz & tried again. It was working but still wasn't getting the ice at the top chewed up, so I left it on the counter to melt a bit while I ate my supper. Probably 10 minutes or so. Then when I blended again, all the ice got pulverized.

Thick enough to eat with a spoon! The texture was creamy like soft-serve cream, except with some ice crystals. I could overlook that little flaw in order to replace something liquid & unsatisfying with something that felt like an actual indulgent snack.

You know me and my recipes. They aren't remotely perfected, aren't even written like recipes, are always works in progress - but the important thing is, they are healthy & taste good. My goal is simply that you use this info to design your own experiments. Have fun and report back on any successes!

November 9

415a-fr egg, chick saus, English muffin, c reg, Met, fish oil, multi
5a-c reg
8a-Americano w/ SF syrup, egg bake, 2 orejitas
1145a-2c decaf, stevia, salad w/ hb egg, krill oil, multi
130p-2c decaf, 3 orejitas
230p-2c decaf
4p-egg bake, T mustard, 2c decaf
7p-2s chicken spaetzle soup, fish oil, multi
8p-Met, greens, yeast, NC
9p- 5HTP, Tyrosine

Totals: 1527 cal, 55g fat (11 sat), 147g carbs (30 fiber), 119g protein

Yesterday was a great day. I definitely feel like I'm on an upward spiral. In the spirit of my favorite holiday, let me list the wonderful things in my life:
-my favorite teammate comes back to work today
-I get to run a 5k on my birthday
-I'm joining a just-for-fun 11k tomorrow night (11/11/11) at 11pm
-my pull-ups are kicking ass
-I just wrote out my check for the powerlifting meet (eep!)
-I booked a weekend getaway w/ Hop to celebrate the trifecta of our 10-year dating anniversary, my birthday, and pumping season survival
-nutrition is [currently] very easy, going perfectly
-my recent retail therapy is happy-making (Monday I wore new boots, yesterday a new dress, today new jeans & a Wonder Woman necklace, tomorrow more new boots!)
-I'm seeing & feeling awesome body comp progress
-I've had a couple highly motivating wellness convos lately
-I booked a weekend workout date with Joy that will include barbells
-work is going wonderfully
-thanks to Steve's habit experiment, I literally look down at my belly perhaps once per day, and then I immediately fix my posture to put it back out of sight...hate-free!
-every workout this week has felt totally fucking solid
-I'm making fantastic progress on testing acne reactions
-my 5-week stretch of busy weekends starts now, but is actually looking fun

Basically, my brain is in a good place, and everything is feeding the spiral! I am a happy Hoppe.

Not going well: sleep. The time change is really fucking my shit up. I was awake at 315 yesterday. Not tired-and-couldn't-sleep, just wide awake. Today I woke at 315, but managed to doze off & on until I just got up at 430. UGH!

I currently feel good, energized, no issues, but as the past has indicated that consecutive nights of sleep this low usually precipitates a binge, I'm being very strategic about my nutrition plan. I'm adding in some starches specifically timed to compensate for the sleep and keep my energy level up, and instead of a full-day fast or just low-cal meals, I'm plotting an Eat-Stop-Eat fasting regimen:
-Wednesday eve: skipped eve snack
-Thursday eve: skip eve snack
-Friday: skip breakfast and morning snack
-Saturday: skip breakfast and morning snack
-Sunday: eat normal

Skipping 6 meals/snacks is going to amount to the same calories as a full fast day. This might normally just make me feel deprived on 4 consecutive days, but:
-skipping the eve snacks should be easy since I made an awesome discovery last night! I turned my supplement drink into ice cream! (Recipe to follow.)
-Friday is a tax update class in St Cloud, and Saturday is a Relay for Life round table in Fergus Falls. Since all-out fasting is not an option I want to explain to others, a half-fast should work. Each day will start out feeling like a typical fast day, then I just eat lunch with everyone else and follow my usual eating pattern the rest of the day. easy!

I'm even planning a date night with Hop on Saturday night! Supper & a movie...though don't be too jealous, as the movie will be Transformers, which Netflix has kindly loaned us for the last two months...for $10. Anyway, by skipping a total of 6 meals/snacks, I will have calories banked for a relatively indulgent supper. Can't beat that! I'm thinking ribs. (I'm always thinking ribs.)

Sunday afternoon is really the only chance I'd have for my nutrition to go awry, as I'll be home alone. However, my phrase of the weekend is: "A binge is not inevitable." I'm going to be able to sleep in the next three days, can probably even squeeze in a nap here & there. And hydration is going to be watched with a hawk's eye. Plus, I'm a total nerd who checked out a book about leptin last night, and maybe getting into the scientific-y details will help the logical side of my brain stay in control. I have hope!

November 8

5a-fr egg, 5oz chicken breast, 2 sl toast, T apple butter, c reg, Met, multi, fish oil
6a-c reg, stevia, s orejitas
7a-2c decaf, stevia
845a-2c decaf, stevia
10a-egg bake, orange, 2c decaf, flavor drops
1p(PWO)-5oz tuna, 2T mustard, sesame rice crackers, krill oil, multi
a’noon snacking-8 almonds
430p-egg bake
630p-salad w/ hb egg, NC
730p-protein crepes, Met, reds, yeast, fish oil, multi
8p-.5oz pistachios
930p-5HTP, Tyrosine

Totals: 1796 cal, 57g fat (10 sat), 168g carbs (27 fiber), 153g protein

Exactly on plan!

Free autographs for my fans!

Strong is the New Skinny featured YOURS TRULY on their Facebook page. Too cool!!

November 7

5a-Met, fish oil, multi, c reg
6a-c reg, stevia, BCAAs
730a(PWO)-BCAAs, 2c decaf
830a-2c decaf, flavor drops
1030a-2c decaf
130p(PWO)-BCAAs, multi, fish oil, 2c decaf
630p-2c herbal tea
730p-Met, greens, yeast, fish oil, multi
830p-NC, 5HTP, Tyrosine

Totals: 223 cal, 6g fat (0 sat), 28g carbs (10 fiber), 13g protein

Fast day, and easily so. I even did two workouts (taught my class & subbed for Heather) and still wasn't dying. BCAAs were an experiment, couldn't really tell if they made a difference, would have to compare to a similar day without them! Either way, I pretty much felt like Wonder Woman.

Definitely noted that I was quite tired by about 7pm, as my brother & cousin popped over to see if we wanted to go to Sidewalks, but being unable to drink anything besides decaf or water, and freezing, and tired, and basically no fun, I declined. I even went to bed at 845pm! Some of this can be attributed to the time change, of course, but fasting + 2 workouts surely impacted it.

From about two weeks ago, I am down 2 lbs according to my home scale. More importantly, I am seeing definition return to my upper abs & my thighs, which is hugely motivating! Progress feeds progress. I hope I'm on an upward spiral!

Acne: I tested wheat this weekend, and still no reaction. You know what I'm now suspecting? Gum. Fucking GUM! Who knows, maybe even dairy is okay after all, because despite my obsessive level of food tracking, I've never in my life worried about gum intake. Ever. As to whether I chewed a lot last year when the acne went horrible, I'm not certain, but probably. It's a good go-to to keep from eating. I definitely cut it out during the Whole30, and tried to stay off it most of the time since then. But I've always had some in my drawer at work and so it's quite possible that it caused every single reaction. Who knows? What I do know is that in the last couple weeks that I HAVE been tracking it, cysts have soon followed. I can't decide whether being able to eat dairy is good or bad, needing willpower to avoid ice cream, but I can tell you this: I'll be testing it soon. My birthday is just 2 hardcore-dieting weeks away, and I think some pumpkin pie is in order!

Habit: wonderful. I am wearing my snug blue size 2 dress, and while I still zero in on the belly with every view of my side reflection, I don't hate it! It looks good today. And I basically don't look down at my belly ever, or if I do, I immediately correct to proper posture and smile as it disappears. No hateful dark alleys. Such a tiny thing, so little effort, but such a huge payoff. I think I owe Steve Reishus a gift.

And finally, I made a decision about the powerlifting meet. Thanks to wise words shared by my amazing friend Joy* and Dustin, I'm in. I'm going to leap outside my box and act like the badass I wanna be. Fake it 'til you make it, right?

Select knowledge-bombs from them:

Joy: I will tell you that for me, showing up that day (with my husband supporting me) and giving it a try was a HUGE self-esteem builder, even though I failed at the 100 bench attempt the victory of trying was sweeter than the victory of a successful press ever would have been.

Super impactful quote that she shared: Try and fail, but don't fail to try. -Stephen Kaggwa


Dustin:  Go into it for the experience, to enjoy it with people who have similar interests as yourself. People who think it is fun to get together on Saturday and lift weights or run ALL DAY! [< possibly my favorite line, recognizing that I do not consider such folks to be unusual!] And hopefully at the end of the day you have improved on your lifts, or at least learned a little more about yourself and your training.

Super impactful quote that he shared: Don't let the fear of failure prevent you from taking the first step.


So, you know what?

Fuck fear.

Let's do this.

Upcoming goals list: Turkey Trot 5k on my birthday (11/24, gifts may be mailed to PO Box 307, West Union, MN 56389!), Snowflake Shuffle 5k on 12/10 (tentatively), NSS powerlifting meet on 1/14.

I think Wonder Woman would approve.


* Just last night I was listening to a podcast that focuses on the mental aspects of dieting down, training for your dream body, etc. On this episode they talked about support you receive or don't receive when you make these efforts. They said you will be surprised (& disappointed) at the people who do not support you when you fully expected them to, whether this is because of jealousy or their lowered self-esteem or diverging lifestyles. But more importantly, you will be even more surprised (& delighted) at the people who end up supporting you that you would never have imagined would help you in your journey.

Like Joy.

I would say that a year ago we had barely said more than "hi" to each other, despite being coworkers for 5 years. But now she is one of my top go-to people when it comes to wellness. I talk to her about recipes, workouts, nutrition, everything. She's also my SpartaBuddy, but more appropriately, my Super SpartaBuddy! Thanks, woman!