Thursday, September 29

Body: Bad sleep yet again; woke h/s/g and had to get up and eat (buttered bread). Took ages to fall back, of course. Got up okay because brain SO GOOD. Feeling unhappy in the knees, and low back still tight, but otherwise pretty damned good. Woke up determined to climb the rope today, stop fucking around: and I did it. Chief wasn't there, so I got to tell him I did it while he was out, THREE TIMES, and he said that's not possible because it's illegal - I agreed with a smile. It's been fun, but I am VERY ready to change back to a powerlifting focus. I really really miss my barbell. Couple more weeks...just a couple.

Brain: So good, so good, so good! Woke up knowing that today the NSS team would hear the news. Got to meet with Chief about various things including hearing his excitement about the giant ongoing website project. Had a really fun training session with Tony & Jeremy, though naturally missed Chief. Chief announced All The News to the team, and their reaction pretty much made my LIFE. I thought Paige was going to cry. (I thought I might cry.) They brought bootch for the WHOLE TEAM, most of whom had never had it, and most seemed to have liked it. Had a major panic when several of them began shaking theirs up, DON'T SHAKE THEM! It was such a wonderful time. We also had free lunch for Katelynn's birthday so it was just the bestest evah. Had to ditch early to go lead a group fitness thing with Other Chief and I was the main/lead person, and it was super dee duper fun times! Silly, fun, my element. And OC had lovely things to say afterward, which made me glow. Then I took the supplies back to NSS, and OMG my young coworkers were the most loveliest, wanting to hear all about it and how long in the works and Paige especially, and FUCK I'm going to miss her. So much silly fun, I was there until 5:30 and leaving was like walking out with a posse of besties. These are my people. This is my tribe. I am forever grateful to have found it, and I will do my best, always, every fucking DAY, to make it a success. Got home early enough to play fetch, to read, to snuggle with kittehs, to reflect on all the happy happiness.

Wednesday, September 28

Body: Took forever to fall asleep, woke h/s/g at 3a but didn't get up, woke at 4, woke to dogs at 530a, got up okay but unhappy. Right knee is having issues on the backside and lower right (almost ITB?) in addition to where the quad insertion has been aching. Yesterday I decided it may be caused by the SL squats on Tuesdays, and the way things ache today, it feels even more certain. QLs are also tighter today than they were on Monday. Have been tight for a couple weeks now, stretching them in sessions. Low back also quite tight today, very much so.

Brain: Good. Talked with other tax boss for much of the morning about how to make tax season better and what I can do here yet, and it may be longer than I really WANT it to be, but still as short as I NEED it to be. And everyone is being very kind and thoughtful and understanding. Lunched with Mom and told her, so the news will fly quickly. Unhappy news HH didn't get into Boston (by 48 stupid seconds!) but BL immediately pointed out that makes it more likely she can come to MN for Spring Superior and MAN ALIVE I hope that happens! Happy news for BL and a new job in Alex (he had been looking at maybe moving) which is a big fat YAAAAY!

Had a wonderful time at the SGC kickoff at NSS. Got to talk to women about doing pull-ups and how hard they are yet how satisfying they are. Loved seeing that although we certainly had a lot of body comp goal chasers, at least half are chasing a strength goal. SUPER pumped for these team trainings to begin!

Tuesday, September 27

Body: Really good. Killed it in today's session, even by doing more weight than I was supposed to because T-Dog used the wrong day. Take THAT Dustin, quit underestimating me! Ran at Woodland with Ann and made her get to 3 miles, but I felt like I could've done more. It's good to keep feeling this, but damn I miss my beastie who could reliably pull me along for 7.1 no matter what.

Brain: So good. A chaotic day without the sick Chief, but much was accomplished and it was fantastic to watch the team pull together and get shit done.

I worked through SGC program with Other Chief, then went through it with a couple coaches who have injury-issue clients and figured out some good modifications. Happy to have the chance to be proactive about that because it's a lot tougher when there are 21 other people needing direction at the same time.

Ordered a gift for Paige, who I'm really going to miss...NSS is going to have a much different feel without her silliness. Found a wonderful source of Heidi gifts, and also realized it's almost her birthday, which made me delay the package so I can find another thing or two for her. She is one of my favorite people.

My BB stopped by to nab my bag full of Wonder Woman wearables for GP to dress up in. I am not exactly her size, but most of it is small for me, and pins could make things work if need be. I'm excited to see what she comes up with. the little rockstar.

Emailed the boss boys about the status. Other Chief writes such amazing emails in response. He can't be my favorite Chief, those giant shoes are filled4lyfe - but man, he impresses me a little bit more with every interaction. These are SO my people.

Monday, September 26

Body: Antsy all day thanks to existential crisis. LCSP-ing with Ann was too short, but it was something. Body felt amazing after a recovery weekend.

Brain: Ugh, tough. Had to disappoint the second-best boss pair I've ever had. Had to disappoint all my coworkers. Tried to alleviate some of it with a semi-open timeline, but it will never be good enough for them, but just this once I need to be extremely selfish. I must. I must. Some email therapy with my beloved Heidi that helped me make the right choice: love that girl. I am still nervous and anxious and scared but I know it's going to be the right thing in the end, I have zero doubts. But still. It was good to get to LCSP fall beauty, but I also need to get there solo to really soak it up.

Sunday, September 25

Body: Better sleep, since the dogs were properly exhausted. But still not very good. Woke up with a sore/tight lower back, and weirdly aching front tooth, which went away. Probably dehydrated and over-coffeed from yesterday. The rain was coming down steadily so we packed up & headed west, and found a new state park with trails to hike. Again too short, but it was a compromise with the rest of the family who wanted to be home. At home, knocked out necessary chores and then was lazy. Could've done a workout, but didn't have it in my plans, so I let it go.

Brain: Upset by the rain, but what can you do? Not control the weather, obviously. Happy we found a place to hike after all, and it was lovely. Drive got old, happy to get home to snuggly kittehs. Knocked out chores. Read.

Thought about tomorrow's conversation and how selfish I should be. I want myself to be far more selfish than I normally would ever allow. Perhaps it's time to re-read some of my journaling from last winter...yep, that did it. Specifically, THIS did it. In just 6 weeks I turned into a crying-all-day puddle of depression. And stayed pretty low for most of 4 months. That's 1/3 of my life. That's not okay. I'm just not built for that kind of workload.

Saturday, September 24

Body: TERRIBLE night of sleep, with anxious dogs that barked at every strange noise (all noises were strange) and a Hank who insisted on sleeping with us in a too-small bed. AWFUL. Got up to down coffee outside with a book and let the tired hubs keep sleeping, then fetched more coffee & took Hanky walking over to the Marina. After a few hours, our first hike was gorgeous but far too short (hubs' knee felt badly). NAP TIME. Then another easy too-short hike that was supposed to be a half-mile longer, but Lexi was struggling so probably good that it wasn't. Went to bed very early

Brain: Decent. Enjoyed some lake time with Hankypank. Wished we could've gone hiking for many more miles, or on a run. Maybe tomorrow, but the weather looks to be bad. Today's was decent; mostly cool & sometimes misty, but not raining, and not hot, I enjoyed it! Did some truck-based sight-seeing which was better than nothing, but not my favorite. Got most of a book read. Did my best not to think about next week.

Friday, September 23

Body: Feeling very sore in the lower body all morning, sore upper body by the afternoon. 3.5 hours in the truck treated me better than it usually does.

Brain: Excellent. Got a ton of work done, had good chitchat with all, had the bestest convo with boss boys that leave me with a rough conversation to have with the other boss boys. I am both delighted and terrified. Tripped up north to our tiny cabin with the hubs & the dogs. Excited to hike!